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SATC SPOILER poll

If you were stood up at the alter - would you forgive the person and still marry them later?

Is infidelity a deal breaker for you? Or not? Why?

Do you envision yourself as single or married in your 40s?

Where would you like to be in your 40s? Go into as much detail as you like.

Re: SATC SPOILER poll

  • If you were stood up at the alter?- would you forgive the person and still marry them later? No...have the balls to say something before then...like she said, he humiliated her. ?It was very Big/Carrie like for it to happen that way though...a big blowup and then they come back together. ?I was happy that they got married in the end, but I was furious for her that he did that...that him seeing her in the dress with the veil wasn't enough to believe it was really just her and him. ?I could get back with someone if they broke off an engagement, but why wait until that moment? ?If I did get back with them and decide to get married, I would be terrified they would just do it again!

    Is infidelity a deal breaker for you? Or not? Why? I say yes, but I have never had anyone be unfaithful while in a relationship with them (in HS I had a boyfriend in the Army who cheated on me, but I found out after we broke up...I would have dumped him if we were together when I found out though). ?It is a really difficult, really personal situation. ?Like he said, what about the other vows? ?A lot of couples overcome infidelity and have stronger marriages, but I think it would be so crushing and so hard to trust again after that. ?

    Do you?envision yourself as single or married in your 40s? Married!

    Where would you like to be in your 40s? Go into as much detail as you like. Solid in my career, focused on my family, great friends.

    James & Lauren ~ 9/22/07 * Expecting our first ~9/10/11 Lilypie Pregnancy tickers
  • I think these questions are so tough for me to answer. I feel I can't say one way or another until I've been in that position. Being stood up would be beyond heartbreaking, but again, it depends on the circumstances. While what he did was horrid, she could understand her part in that she 'let the wedding get bigger than big'. So I guess, I don't know.

    Infidelity. I want to just jump and say 'deal breaker' but again, I've never experienced that and life is complicated. And I do believe it's true that GOOD people do make mistakes. We are all weak in one way or another. I think if I did try to forgive, I still don't know that I would be able to trust, so I'd probably have to move on. But I just can't predict my feelings.

    I envision myself feeling much more secure and happy and therefore successful. Which I would typically associate with being single. But I will definitely be married to my man, and be different. Better.?

  • If you were stood up at the alter - would you forgive the person and still marry them later?

    good lord ... it would completely depend on the situation. there would be no immediate forgiveness .... he would have to fight/prove his way BACK into my good graces and even then, i'm still not so sure. like the saying goes - if you let your love go and they don't return it was never meant to be. if you let them go and they come back- crawling and groveling w/ an ENORMOUS walk-in closet just for your shoes/handbags then it was certainly meant to be.

    Is infidelity a deal breaker for you? Or not? Why? hell yes - there is no coming back from that- ever.

    Do you envision yourself as single or married in your 40s? d-oh married

    Where would you like to be in your 40s? Go into as much detail as you like.

    more secure w/ myself ... w/ a kid or 2 and a house

    Love - a wildly misunderstood although highly desirable malfunction of the heart which weakens the brain, causes the eyes to sparkle, cheeks to glow, blood pressure to rise and the lips to pucker - Author Unknown

    AlternaTickers - Cool, free Web tickers

  • If you were stood up at the alter - would you forgive the person and still marry them later? No and I don't care what the circumstances are.  Anywho chooses to humiliate me to such a degree obviously doesn't "love" me.

    Is infidelity a deal breaker for you? Or not? Why? Not a dealbreaker - but bones will be broken. 

    Do you envision yourself as single or married in your 40s? No clue, I think both is okay.  I'd lead a pretty full life eitherway.

    Where would you like to be in your 40s? Go into as much detail as you like. Divorced - happily livng in the City or living with my Mother.  Married - happily living in the country (with a place in the City), maybe a few rug rats, and definitely with my Mother living with us.  I'd like to still maintain my dress size and not expand too much. But they say it becomes more difficult as you age.

  • I just can't imagine being stood up at the alter.  It's seems so extreme that I can't imagine forgiving.  Maybe if he was in a horrible car accident and in the ER?

    Infidelity...this is more of a gray area. So much would depend on the circumstances so not necessarily a deal breaker (divorce and single motherhood is no piece of cake) but a lot of fricking counseling for sure...maybe a leash, curfew, husband cam type scenario :)

    I sure hope I'm still married in my 40s...the alternatives seem pretty heartbreaking.  In addition to still being married I'd like to be more comfortable financially, with a few kiddos, nice enough home with a sweet kitchen, good heath, nice vacations, maybe some free time here and there...

     
    btw...my gals and I really enjoyed the movie...we saw it Friday night and the scene was sort of a trip.  There were all these teen girls and I kept thinking, why are you here, how can you relate?  Oh, well...it was fun :)
     

  • Ok, I haven't seen SATC, but I'll play

    1.  It depends on the reason I was stood up. I'd like to think that there could be extenuating circumstances. Then again, I'd like to think that I can be strong enough and move onwards if there was no good excuse.

    2. No it is not, but it depends on the reason behind it. There's really a lot behind infidelity: how many there were, why, what gender... All of these things make a difference to me and make the difference between deal breaker and not.

    3. Married... to S :)

    4. I'd like to be still be living in No Cal, ideally with 2 kids (as unlikely as that may be) and happily on my way to being a VP at a tech company. In an ideal world, I'd have already had one big success at a start-up, paid off my house, and bought a place for my parents close by. Wow, that's a lot to do in 10 years. I need to get a move-on.
     

  • No, I would not marry them later.  I would hope that they had the balls to  back out before that day .  I do think it is worse to marry someone when you have doubts though.  So, thanks for saving me the divorce I guess.

    Infidelity is a deal breaker for me.  If you cheat or beat, I am gone.  Trust is #1 to me, without it we have no relationship.

    Married, with a couple of kids.

    I would like to start my own business before my 40's.  I would love to have a good marriage, happy children and a career I love. A house would be nice too.

  • I don't think I would marry that person anyway - not without a lot of work on the relationship and a lot of time. ?Obviously, things are broken in the relationship and would need to be worked on before making a life together.

    Yes and no. ?Yes in the sense that it would break me. ?It would break what we have, and I would never be the same person. ?The DNA of our relationship would never be the same. ?And no, in that I need to know that the good we have will always be better than the worst bad - that we're worth fighting for. ?How's that for a non-answer!

    My 40's... married and doing more of what we're doing. ?More travel. More adventure. ?More life. ?Professionally, I would like to be a partner in my agency, and personally - I don't know what I'll be doing or where we will be, but I want to be wiser, smarter and feeling like my best is yet to come.

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