Husband and I will be married 6 years in June, together for 10. A little background: we have no kids, both work full time. I make more money, but he does more around the house. He has narcolepsy--not the fall down and fall asleep kind, but the 'always tired/always crabby' kind. He's on medication that he's tried tweaking several times but nothing really works, except he's a teacher, so summers that he has off are always terrific. He's happy, considerate, and easy to get along with during the summer! I fell in love with him during the summer and didnt know he'd be so crabby/hard to get along with the other 9 months of every year, and only recently figured out that this really is a pattern of behavior for him. School years are HELL and I find myself looking forward to "really living" and happiness each summer brings. The thing I'm struggling with is the other 9 months of the year! I take my vows very seriously, and especially think about "in sickness and in health", but we rarely get along during the school years, and I'm thinking about leaving this marriage. He's disrespectful (ignores me when I'm talking, gives me one word answers as he seems too "busy" to be bothered while playing his computer games or correcting papers to answer more than that. When I call him out on it that if I'm speaking, he needs to pause his game/work and participate, he guilts me by saying "its the only way I can stay awake" or tells me I'm being to sensitive). He's quick tempered over the littlest things. 99% of our arguments stem from his lack of respect for me. (He'll leave the table while I'm still eating to do dishes, or not answer if I'm talking to him, faces away from the table while we're eating because he says his legs don't fit under it--yet it's a table and he's a normal sizes man, so they do fit). Yet he'll buy me extravagant gifts or make me dinner, but the minute I open my mouth, he acts like he could care less. I feel like a houseplant, not a wife. He's Jekyll and Hyde--outgoing, attentive, happy when we're around other people and my family no matter what time of year it is, but when we're alone, he won't talk to me and rarely smiles. So of course when we've been to counseling, we don't get anywhere since he puts on a "show" that everything is fine and I'm the one with the problem for thinking there is one! It's so manipulative, that it makes me feel like I'm losing it! He doesn't hit me, but I feel the emotional neglect or whatever it is makes me want to leave! Am I being stupid? My family of course thinks he's Mr Wonderful, since he is when he's around them, so it makes it that much harder to leave. What do I do? I want children, but I'm 34 and beginning to realize I can't bring them into this mess (or what I think is a mess anyway--everyone else thinks he's wonderful and thinks he'd make a good father. I dont doubt that, I just think he's a shitty husband!). I have nothing on paper or proof that he is this way. I know hes better during the summer, but I hate living this way. Any advice?