Relationships
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Friend problem

in highschool i became very good friends (almost family like) with a girl and through out the 4 years we had our ups and downs, she comes from a pretty wrecked family and so she has alot of personal issues, and alot of them are why she is as she is, and she is selfish and when things dont go to her liking she flips out and blames everyone but herself.. and finally about 2 years ago she wanted to come visit me for her birthday and basically said me and my husband (boyfriend at the time) were going to get tickets to this hockey game and go with her... now we couldnt afford it, and couldnt make it work, so i told her and she played the "ill go where im wanted" card...which made NO sense what so ever, so i told her if she is going to be demanding and rude and expect people to drop things at a dime for her, she has a long life ahead of her..and she completly removed me from everything "emails, cellphone, facebook" which was fine, i was ready to let that friendship go seeing as i really didnt want that kind of person in my life, well NOW, just the other day i commented on a mutual old friend from HS's FB page and she commented, then sent me a message being extremely friendly, and i thought okay, maybe shes changed... i dont know if giving our friendship another shot is worth it, or if i should watch her from a distance and keep my guard up so i can let go at anytime

Re: Friend problem

  • Let this chick GO.

    Why do you need, or want, anybody who treats you as a piece of crap?

    This friend is no friend. Make a clean break of it --- vanish from the scene; you do not owe her an explanation. Let her figure it out.
  • image TarponMonoxide:
    Let this chick GO.

    Why do you need, or want, anybody who treats you as a piece of crap?

    This friend is no friend. Make a clean break of it --- vanish from the scene; you do not owe her an explanation. Let her figure it out.

    I agree with this.

    Unless you enjoy drama and crazy, then go for it. 

  • I fully believe people can grow and change. It's been 2 years. I personally would want to give it a shot. But I'd absolutely proceed w caution and not invest too much time or energy until I got a better sense as to whether she's really changed or not. 
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  • This type of issue happened to me as well. Had an issue with my good friend after high school because I said something she didnt want to hear. I got cussed out and screamed at. 5 years later this same women tried to add me back on facebook, trying to say she has changed and her life was much different,etc etc. I as well wanted to give it a try.  Well needless to say 8 months later she had removed me again because I wasnt a real friend anymore. Just try not to have the hopes that she has changed. If you dont get sucked in, you might have an easier time when she lets you down.

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  • image EastCoastBride:
    I fully believe people can grow and change. It's been 2 years. I personally would want to give it a shot. But I'd absolutely proceed w caution and not invest too much time or energy until I got a better sense as to whether she's really changed or not. 

    This.  I've been there too.  Some people have drifted back in to my life.  I'm fine having them as FB friends and commenting here and there but I wouldn't count on going back to a full fledged friendship.

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  • image EastCoastBride:
    I fully believe people can grow and change. It's been 2 years. I personally would want to give it a shot. But I'd absolutely proceed w caution and not invest too much time or energy until I got a better sense as to whether she's really changed or not. 

    Ditto. I also want to say that no one can demand things of you. Sure, she may have had certain expectations, but that doesn't mean you have to accept or follow through with them.  

  • Yeah i am keeping her at arms length so to speak, small chats, etc, but im not letting her get back into my life for awhile without her proving she deserves to be there, i will give it time and see if its worth having her in my life anymore or if shes changed, and if not i guess she wasnt meant to be around in the first place, friends grow apart, its part of life i suppose.
  • Between friendship, "Trust" is the thing that is important. If both trust on each other, then it is called a true friendship. If trust is not there then there is no mean of relation. So, in my views, let her go if she doesn't provide any mean to you that what value is of your in your life.
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