My husband and I can not have children and are probably not going to adopt. We're at the age of deciding and I think we have made our decision.
As our engagement and marriage path unfolded, his sister became pregnant and had a quick wedding. Now, she has a child and two stepchildren. DH was the golden child in his family while his grandmother was alive and up until the new baby came. Now, his parents spend a lot of money supporting his sister, travelling to see her, paying for her to travel home, and buying the baby both toys and essentials. They have very little energy or concern for us.
I love and miss them. And, I fully admit that I am jealous. I have been part of the family for 4 years and had a nice place, too. Now, we have puppies and she has a baby. Our puppies have done well for puppies, but do not get along with her dog because she simply does not want to play. They have also been startled by the older children and the children have also been startled, but everyone seems to find their place eventually.
All of her family will be going to our hometown for Christmas and we were uninvited because of the puppies. We want to go to see my family since we went to TX for the birth last year. So, we made arrangements for the puppies and planned to stay in a hotel. SIL, BIL, children, baby, and dog could stay in great-grandfather's home comfortably and there will always be too many of them to stay comfortably at in-laws home. We were only asked to go so far out of our way so that the baby would be in grandma's house day and night. Did I mention that the dog was never uninvited?
They just recanted the uninvite for us and the puppies, but I am uncomfortable. It isn't about anyone doing anything differently; it is simply about my jealousy. I am sad that we aren't as special anymore. Their hearts seem to have limits and there is less room for us now. Is this common? Have others had this experience? I'd love to just hear that I am not alone. I think I have enough time and awareness to calm my negative reactions and enjoy the holiday, but I sort of figured that this is not entirely unusual.
Thanks for reading!