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What would you do?

Long story short I babysit for my boyfriends bestfriends girlfriend and have been for about 2 months. Recently she hit a stump with money and hasn't paid me in 2 weeks. And now I'm suppose to watch her again this Thurs. and Fri. and don't know how to come out and say you haven't paid me so I can't watch her. She has also become a friend and I don't want this to ruin anything. 

Hope you can help! 

Re: What would you do?

  • Time is money.

    I'd say to her, "In case you've forgotten, Mary --- you still owe me $200; if you don't mind, and no hard feelings, I need the money now."

    And if she doesn't ante up, tell her you don't babysit for her anymore. If she gets huffy and stops talking to you, no loss. This friend was never a friend.
  • srgwsrgw member
    1000 Comments Third Anniversary 5 Love Its Combo Breaker

    image TarponMonoxide:
    Time is money.

    I'd say to her, "In case you've forgotten, Mary --- you still owe me $200; if you don't mind, and no hard feelings, I need the money now."

    And if she doesn't ante up, tell her you don't babysit for her anymore. If she gets huffy and stops talking to you, no loss. This friend was never a friend.

    Ditto this.

    I'm all about doing favors for friends. However, if watching her kids is your job and she's not paying you, you're volunteering your time. Can you financially afford to volunteer your time? 

  • WahooWahoo member
    Ancient Membership 2500 Comments 5 Love Its Combo Breaker

    image TarponMonoxide:
    Time is money.

    I'd say to her, "In case you've forgotten, Mary --- you still owe me $200; if you don't mind, and no hard feelings, I need the money now."

    And if she doesn't ante up, tell her you don't babysit for her anymore. If she gets huffy and stops talking to you, no loss. This friend was never a friend.

    Ditto this.

    I do favors for friends with kids all the time.  But I don't tie up my weeks planning to help them out.  The fact that she has hit a slump is not your problem.  If you are not sitting, she would have to hire someone else (and pay them).  

    image "Before you diagnose yourself with depression or low self esteem, first make sure you are not, in fact, just surrounded by assholes.
  • Are you babysitting so she can work? Or do something fun? How much do you babysit? Did you start off at friends or did you become friends?

    is boyfriends best friend the father? I consider my husband's friends my friends (even when he was my boyfriend) so to me this would be babysitting for a friend if this is the case

    Here's the difference to me, I would in a heartbeat watch a friends baby as a favor and not expect to be paid. But I could not do this regularly because, time is money. Sounds to me that you knew of this girl, developed a friendship in seeing her so much...but the business relationship is primary.

    So some actual advice (although if you can answer some questions I might be able to better advise): I would ask her/him "I'm know I"m watching lil one on Thursday and Friday but I need to know am I doing this as a favor to you or will I be paid? I need to know so I can plan my own finances"

    Try to get them to commit to one or the other (pay/favor). If they are to pay you then they should pay you that night. You can say "I can't take an IOU this time". If they want you to do it as a favor, I would remind them that you babysit for income. Perhaps (depending on the relationship) you can offer to do Thursday/Friday as a favor but say that you can't commit to that in the long term.

  • Did you put anything down in writing?  If not you're kind of SOL.  You can either demand the money you owe and risk there be bad blood between the two of you, which in turn might cause possible problems between the boyfriends.  Or, eat the loss and stop doing babysitting for her without some sort of formal contract.
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • image dragon_chica:
    Did you put anything down in writing?  If not you're kind of SOL.  You can either demand the money you owe and risk there be bad blood between the two of you, which in turn might cause possible problems between the boyfriends.  Or, eat the loss and stop doing babysitting for her without some sort of formal contract.


    Next time do this. Chalk it up to experience.:)

    Gentlewomen's agreements" or just an agreement and a handshake don't cut it today if you're looking to do some type of business. Years ago, yeah, but not now.
  • I think you should talk to her about what kind of a plan she has for paying you back. It doesn't seem as though you were close friends before that would lend you to doing this as a favor, especially if it is a frequent thing. Do you really want to spend your free time not getting paid to watch someone else's kid?
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