Buying A Home
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Overdue update to wanting to strangle DH...

So, last Thursday we got an offer on our house after 48 hours on the market and DH freaked.  He wound up countering WAY over the asking price and (of course) the buyers walked.

He's not ready to move.  THINGS HE COULD HAVE TOLD ME BEFORE WE PUT THE HOUSE ON THE MARKET!!  He only put it on because he knew it would make me happy.. but HELLO.. why put it on if you have no intention of selling it?

Anyway, we took the house off the market and are going to renovate our cape cod into a colonial.  It's actually cheaper than buying what we want and we get to stay in our neighborhood.

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Re: Overdue update to wanting to strangle DH...

  • That is quite a bit of drama to put yourselves through if this is how he felt.   Are you happy about this?   It sounds like maybe your DH needs to work on his communications skills.   I would still shy away from sinking that kind of renovation money into a house in this economy.  Good luck to you, it was nice that you updated.  I wondered if you buried him in the back yard :)

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  • To make you feel better...

    Six months after DH and I got married, I switched jobs to one 60 miles away.  The commute was killing me and DH had mentioned also wanting to change jobs.  So we put the house on the market, sold it, and bought a house $150k more than the first one bc of the increase in the COL.

    Only AFTER we moved did DH mention he didn't want to quit his job, actually loved it, and wanted to stay with that company for life.

    O.M.G.  Are you effing kidding me!?

    So yeah, it happens.  I still tease him about that...especially bc that house we bought is now worth $70k less than we paid for it and it is an albatross in our financial lives.

  • image jay-tea:

    He's not ready to move.  THINGS HE COULD HAVE TOLD ME BEFORE WE PUT THE HOUSE ON THE MARKET!!  He only put it on because he knew it would make me happy.. but HELLO.. why put it on if you have no intention of selling it?

    Uhhhhgggg -- my H has been guilty of things like this multiple times. We put an offer in on a house and then later that day he told me about a job offering in South Africa. I was like "ummm, we just put an offer on a house, so if you want to move to Africa we should probably decide on that soon". He only told me about the opening because he knew I wanted to move there at one time, but jeez. 

  • Sometimes I think men have a conversation with us in their head and then forget that it wasnt actually with us.
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  • image BriGiboo:
    Sometimes I think men have a conversation with us in their head and then forget that it wasnt actually with us.

    H has actually admitted this to me. He says that sometimes he thinks he told me something but really he had just thought about telling me. 

  • image kaylie622:

    image BriGiboo:
    Sometimes I think men have a conversation with us in their head and then forget that it wasnt actually with us.

    H has actually admitted this to me. He says that sometimes he thinks he told me something but really he had just thought about telling me. 

     

    My husband too. He says it's because he feels like we're almost the same person (weird, I know), so when he thinks something he forgets that I don't always know that he's thinking that thought.  He also knows I have a much better memory than he does, so if I say he didn't tell me, then he really didn't tell me.

     Super frustrating though, to have put your house on the market only to have him finally fess up to what he's really thinking/feeling.

  • Edited by moderator.

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