September 2009 Weddings
Dear Community,

Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.

If you have questions about this, please email [email protected]

Thank you.

Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.

I miss Nesting.

Hi.

I miss you guys. I miss the Interwebz. (Well, Interwebz from a real computer, not my phone.) I started a Pinterest account and haven't touched it in weeks. :(

For the mamas: Is it normal for things to take a nosedive in the baby world around 3 - 4 months?  Now that I'm back to work, it seems like all I do is go to work, pick Kyler up from daycare, play with him, put him to bed, try to eat dinner somewhere in there and go to bed myself.  On weekends, I hardly get anything done lately because I'm usually exhausted to the point of tears and Craig has been watching Kyler in the mornings or afternoons so I can sleep in or nap. I'm more overwhelmed now than I've been since Kyler was born.  I'm assuming this all just because I'm working again.  I'd do anything to stay at home with Kyler but it's just not a smart financial decision right now. 

Ok, done whining. (And I hope this doesn't scare any of the new mamas and mamas to be, this could just be me being a poorly adjusted parent or something.)

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Re: I miss Nesting.

  • Hey Tara.  I am sorry you are feeling a little down.  I wanted to let you know that I felt a lot like that around that age with Parker.  I think everything was finally settling in that we were parents now, all the visitors and newness of having a newborn was gone and the reality of how challenging it could be at times and the lack of sleep really was settling in.  It didn't help that a lot of other babies I knew that age had settled into routines and were sleeping well and napping well and I felt like I could hardly handle my life sometimes because P was all over the place.

     I can only imagine that going back to work full time would add a whole other layer of stress and exhaustion for you.  I think with time it will all feel more managable but I am sure it is feeling really hard right now.  You are NOT a poorly adjusted parent, being a parent is hard!  I have days where I feel like that still, and Parker is 14 months old.  I think there is this thing out there where we are all suppose to act like parenting is the most amazing, fufilling thing, and it is a lot of the time, but it is also SO SO hard.  You are amazing mom and if you ever want to chat let me know, I totally can relate to a lot the feelings you shared.  xoxo

  • Oh Lord yes- The first few weeks of Charlotte going to the nanny was fine, then we hit the 4 month wakeful and it has thrown us off. I am hoping she will go out of it, however, we now roll like crazy and she gets mad or scared if she ends up on her belly to sleep and she wakes up screaming. Mark is gone most of the week every week, so its just me. I am so tired on the weekends I dont feel like I ever get adult time with Mark. I actually called a babysitter this week so that Mark and I both could enjoy a night of dinner with just the two of us. It gets better so I hear but I am still waiting on it. Hang in there lady! I am sure you are doing great!
  • I know what you mean. Even though Nate comes to work with me, it isn't any less of a job. I don't ever have a few mins to relax even though both kids nap bc of course it never coincides. I've been really trying to meal plan and make big batches of food sun, tues and thurs so that's one less thing I have to do. Around 4 months is when I felt like I had no friends anymore. It was summer, they were all going out to eat/drink every night and obviously my life is different than that. The best thing I did was find a group on Meetup.com and there's a group of people who have had babies in 2011 so they're all newer moms, been in the same position and like to just get together for dinner/a couple drinks, vs fist pumping at the bar. I know our friends will get there eventually but its nice having people right now. I actually met a woman who had a son the same day I did. We have a lot in common and have become fast friends. She understands if the weekend plans we made won't work bc I'm just exhausted etc. Good luck and let me know if you need anyone to lend an ear. You are absolutely not a poorly adjusted parent. Genevieve was right that all the fuss is over and all of a sudden its like holy sh!t I have a baby!
    Baby, you've got the sort of eyes that tell me tales...
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    :Blog:
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  • Yeah, that's pretty normal. Don't put so much pressure on yourself. Having a child is a neverending cycle of change, because once you get used to them being one way, they start doing something else. You're doing fine.
  • Hey Tara! We miss having you around too:)

    I obviously have no advice, but I just wanted to say I'm sure you're an excellent mom to Kyler and I hope you're able to get some rest as you go through this exhausting phase!  

  • We miss you too!

    No baby advice, but he's adorable!

    White Knot
    Stand up for something you believe in. White Knot
  • Thanks gals. As always, it makes me feel better knowing you guys are going through or have gone through the same things.  I'm still grateful for the support and great advice you all offered when I had breastfeeding drama too.  I guess I've got to stop freaking out and just remember I'm not the first mom in the world to feel completely thrown off by parenting an infant!  The "Holy sh!t I have a baby" moment is so true though ... I had that thought in the shower the other night and then just kind of stood there for a while letting the realization sink in.  (As if I hadn't noticed I'd been caring for a baby for the last 3 months.) :)
    [IMG]http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v323/Tarzie/538849_10151457112340010_805780009_23414326_66864066_n-1.jpg[/IMG]
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  • This could have been me writing.  I have no time to nest and basically every day is the same (work, take care of Nate, spend an hour with Hubby, sleep).  I miss being able to exercise, socialize and spend time doing things for myself).  I'm not as depressed about it as I used to be.  Every month gets better.  It's always a HUGE adjustment from the old life I used to have but I'm learning to accept it.  Just cut yourself some slack and allow yourself to just BE...
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  • Priorities, man.... my life is never my own anymore, and if I have time to myself, I feel guilty thinking I should/could be doing something more productive for someone else.  But this is what we sign ourselves up for when we become parents, right?  Question -- do you have any friends who are parents?  Thats where a lot of my socializing comes from... friends who have kids who understand your schedule and can work with you because you're all on the same wavelength.  Anyway, all I'm saying is try to embrace what you have, rather than beat yourself up over it. 

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