Relationships
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a vent, my thoughts..things i needed to get out :( (long)

i want to be in love with my "best friend."

i want him to treat me like a princess.

i want respect.

i want appreciation.

i want to not hate him.

i dont want to have to walk on eggshells worrying about if im going to do/say something wrong &hes going to go off on me.

im sick of being lectured about everything i do..i want a boyfriend not a boss.

i want honesty.

i want someone i can talk to. someone i can be me around.

i know what a relationship should be & mine is everything it shouldnt be.

ive never wanted out so badly before..i can't stand him anymore..we have one dd who is 1 & another one on the way. i try so hard to stick around so my daughter has both her parents under one roof, but its not working out. im happier when he's not around. I look foward to him going to work so I don;t have to see him. I want out, but at the same time where am i going to go?! i have family i can stay with but i feel like such a failure- i should be moving fowards not backwards by living with my parents.My daughter deserves to sleep in her crib not her pack & play because her mom &dad cant get along. ughh! I just want to scream. idk what to do anymore.  I really think if i leave for a while it might make an impact to his dense brain. im sick of everytime things get rough he runs to talk to the first girl that will give him attention to make himself feel better..thats not ok with me. were 26 & 27 years old its time to grow up. im so happy were not married! and to make matters worse we live off his income (he has a great job) im lucky im able to be a sahm (ive been collecting unemployment just to have some extra money but i dont get much & i have 2 checks left). i'd love to get a job, but whos going to hire someone whos 5 1/2 months prego?  decisions decisions decisions.............................................

Re: a vent, my thoughts..things i needed to get out :( (long)

  • If he's just your boyfriend, it's obviously time to say peace out.  But um, may I ask why you had 2 kids with someone you don't even seem to like much?
    Lilypie First Birthday tickers
  • doglovedoglove member
    5000 Comments Fifth Anniversary 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    imagejagdlg2010:
    i want him to treat me like a princess.

    Maybe you should admit what is really hear instead of wishing you can have something with someone that you don't have. Why do you want to be treated like a Princess? What does that look like? Do you want your life to be like a Disney movie? Sounds like you have some unrealistic expectations for your boyfriend and also that he's a d-bag. Get real about him and find a guy who has the qualities that you do want.

  • TSDTSD member
    imagejagdlg2010:

    i want to be in love with my "best friend."

    i want him to treat me like a princess.

    i want respect.

    i want appreciation.

    i want to not hate him.

    i dont want to have to walk on eggshells worrying about if im going to do/say something wrong &hes going to go off on me.

    im sick of being lectured about everything i do..i want a boyfriend not a boss.

    i want honesty.

    i want someone i can talk to. someone i can be me around.

    i know what a relationship should be & mine is everything it shouldnt be.

    ive never wanted out so badly before..i can't stand him anymore..we have one dd who is 1 & another one on the way. i try so hard to stick around so my daughter has both her parents under one roof, but its not working out. im happier when he's not around. I look foward to him going to work so I don;t have to see him. I want out, but at the same time where am i going to go?! i have family i can stay with but i feel like such a failure- i should be moving fowards not backwards by living with my parents.My daughter deserves to sleep in her crib not her pack & play because her mom &dad cant get along. ughh! I just want to scream. idk what to do anymore.  I really think if i leave for a while it might make an impact to his dense brain. im sick of everytime things get rough he runs to talk to the first girl that will give him attention to make himself feel better..thats not ok with me. were 26 & 27 years old its time to grow up. im so happy were not married! and to make matters worse we live off his income (he has a great job) im lucky im able to be a sahm (ive been collecting unemployment just to have some extra money but i dont get much & i have 2 checks left). i'd love to get a job, but whos going to hire someone whos 5 1/2 months prego?  decisions decisions decisions.............................................

    Ever hear of birth control? It's not like you were a teen mom either. Not that it matters now. But if you wanted those things, you should have waited for the right person. Just because parents are under the same roof doesn't make it a happy family. Kids are sponges that absorb everything. Your daughter is going to know you're unhappy. You need to get off your a$$ and do something. People in much more dire situations figure out how to do it alone, and he's still going to have to pay child support.

  • I agree with TSD. Staying together for the kids is a bad idea. You seem to be in quite the mess here. 

    Going to live with your parents might be the best option. At least you will have a place to stay with your children and you will be happier. 

    image
    For less then ten cents a day, you can feed a hungry child.
  • You're not doing your kids any favors by staying with their father if it makes you miserable.  I suggest you and your boyfriend try some counseling to see if you can salvage the relationship, but you also need to stop being so reliant on him.  Try to find a job (yeah, I know the available job pool is going to be much smaller since you're pregnant, but even temping would provide you with some income) and get your shiit together.  But definitely get into counseling with your boyfriend.  

    image
    "That chick wins at Penises, for sure." -- Fenton
  • salimoosalimoo member

    You know how when you get a toothache and you let it go and just take advil round the clock because the idea of the pain of the dentist is just paralyzing and it's easier to put a bandaid and keep going?

    And then you go to the dentist and yeah, it fvcking HURTS, but then, after a few days, the pain is gone and, better yet, it's gone for good?

    That's what this relationship sounds like. You're either going to be popping advil for the rest of your life or you could take a couple of days (err, relatively and figuratively speaking) and pursue a temporarily more painful but ultimately better solution.

    image

    Husbands should be like Kleenex: Soft, strong, and disposable.
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