There is a pretty long back-story on my MIL. As I?ve said before, she?s selfish, overbearing, entitled, and passive-aggressive. Here is my most recent activity?
My SIL and I were supposed to go see a movie on Friday night, but I wasn?t feeling well so I rescheduled with her. Later that night I got a text from her: ?Do you care if I come over for a little bit? It?s been a really rough day here??. She is currently living at home with MIL & FIL, so I immediately knew that she needed a break from MIL. I told her that she could definitely come over to hang out for a bit?but I looked sloppy and didn?t know how alert I would be since I had taken Nyquil.
She came over and proceeded to tell me that she had a horrible day because of MIL. I asked her what was up and she said that MIL was mad at me for not including her in planning an upcoming baby shower for a cousin. The cousin and I have become really good friends, so I offered to throw her a baby shower. I spoke to the cousin on Thursday (the day before SIL came over to vent) and solidified the date for the shower. I basically told her that any date in February will work for me, so it?s completely up to her?so she chose the 5th.
MIL was mad at me because I didn?t call her to make sure that the date worked for her. I didn?t realize that I needed to call everyone on the guest list first to make sure that the date worked for them. Anyways, SIL continues to tell me that MIL is really upset that I haven?t included her in the planning. The woman is nuts ? I JUST found out the date of it and had not even started to plan it! Side note: there are only 10 people invited and it?s going to be at my house, so there is not a whole lot of planning needed. MIL was also very nasty to SIL all day long because of it.
Then here?s the kicker for me: SIL tells me that MIL started coming up with conspiracy theories about me. I don?t fully trust SIL, so I didn?t pry for more information on what these ?conspiracy theories? might be. And to be honest, I was floored that she would even think of such a thing. SIL said that she told MIL she was being completely irrational and that I had just found out the date of the shower so no planning had even begun.
I would never have known about this if SIL wouldn?t have told me. And I saw MIL yesterday and she acted like nothing was even wrong ? we even started the plans for the shower. I didn?t want to say anything to her about it and how hurt I was that she?s coming up with conspiracy theories about me because SIL confided in me. I?m completely amazed by this woman. I really think that something may be mentally wrong with her. Conspiracy theories? Really?
I talked to DH about this and I told him that I really think that he and his sister need to talk to FIL about MIL. She?s got such a negative effect on both DH and SIL?s lives, and she?s also coming in between our marriage. Their whole family is horrible at communication. They?ve walked on eggshells their whole lives around MIL?being so careful not to ruffle any feathers. DH says that he wants to talk to his dad about this but is not sure that SIL will be on board.
How do you even tell someone that you think a loved one might have a personality disorder or something? I?m sure that FIL is already aware?but this goes back to no one in their family wanting to ruffle any feathers?so they all just sweep it under the rug. TIA