March 2009 Weddings
Dear Community,

Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.

If you have questions about this, please email [email protected]

Thank you.

Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.

Who ever said the truth hurts......

.....was right.

I went for my annual today.  It is never easy to read or hear the words "infertile".  Seeing them on paper just made it worse and more real.  I know it doesn't mean I can't have children but I'm not naive to think it will just magically happen.  I don't want to hear one my person say, "it'll happen in God's timing".  I believe that but really, that's not what I want to hear.

I have a game plan now which is good.  DH and I are on board as to when I'll start TTC.  None of that lessens what I know my body is going to have to go through.  My biggest fear is not being emotionally ready.  I'm not sure I can deal with miscarriages and failed attempts month after month after month.  Truth is - I'm terrified.  I'm bitter.  I'm angry.

Being a teacher and working with fertile women does not help matters.  I am fortunate to have found some co-workers going through the same thing but I'm not sure if that makes it better or worse.

I don't know - so many things going on in my head.  There was no point to this post but self pity.

image

PCOS and Endo

Ovarian drilling and endo removed 1/3/12
BFP - 3/27/12
Beta's 11, 14, 57, 637, 2800
Sono showed no baby and teeny tiny sac. Waiting to M/C naturally.

Re: Who ever said the truth hurts......

  • Oh, Ashley, I am so sorry to hear that.

    What's the plan from here?

    [url="http://www.threelinersandmore.blogspot.com/"]It's a blog. It's not very funny. But it's very random.[/url]


    <a href="http://lilypie.com/"><img src="http://lb3m.lilypie.com/bdP9m5.png" width="200" height="80" border="0" alt="Lilypie Third Birthday tickers" /></a><a href="http://lilypie.com/"><img src="http://lbdm.lilypie.com/aVCym5.png" width="200" height="80" border="0" alt="Lilypie Pregnancy tickers" /></a>
  • Ashley,

    I'm so sorry to hear that, it's good that you have a game plan and when you guys do TTC you know we will be here for you.

  • The tentative plan is to start in January because I don't want to meet a deductible for my insurance now and again in February plus my district is changing insurance companies so I need to make sure my current doctor is on etc.

    January will give me time to get through this semester and leave me with one semester of school left and time to graduate should I miraculously get pregnant right away.  So, in January I start Clomid and until then I take Provera every 40 days to have a period since I'm not on BCP's.

    Not sure how long we stick with Clomid before being more aggressive if no pregnancy happens but we'll cross that bridge later.  I'm praying and hoping that Clomid is all I need to give my body a chance to ovulate and everything else will work like it's supposed to.

    image

    PCOS and Endo

    Ovarian drilling and endo removed 1/3/12
    BFP - 3/27/12
    Beta's 11, 14, 57, 637, 2800
    Sono showed no baby and teeny tiny sac. Waiting to M/C naturally.

  • You and James are in my prayers from here on out. Hoping to hear some good news some time next spring. Until then, you've certainly got enough to keep you busy!
    [url="http://www.threelinersandmore.blogspot.com/"]It's a blog. It's not very funny. But it's very random.[/url]


    <a href="http://lilypie.com/"><img src="http://lb3m.lilypie.com/bdP9m5.png" width="200" height="80" border="0" alt="Lilypie Third Birthday tickers" /></a><a href="http://lilypie.com/"><img src="http://lbdm.lilypie.com/aVCym5.png" width="200" height="80" border="0" alt="Lilypie Pregnancy tickers" /></a>
  • image burkems:
    You and James are in my prayers from here on out. Hoping to hear some good news some time next spring. Until then, you've certainly got enough to keep you busy!

    Yeah, that was the other reason...James' store!  Thanks for the prayers, I appreciate that!

    image

    PCOS and Endo

    Ovarian drilling and endo removed 1/3/12
    BFP - 3/27/12
    Beta's 11, 14, 57, 637, 2800
    Sono showed no baby and teeny tiny sac. Waiting to M/C naturally.

  • Left Hug I like your game plan. I think it's always good to have a plan. I'm sorry you have to go through this, and I've got my fingers crossed for Clomid power.
  • Aww I'm sorry Ashley, that must be tough.

    Sounds like you do have a good plan though.  I will be thinking of you guys! 

  • Sounds like a good plan, I hope the clomid will do it and you don't need anything else. 
  • My thoughts and prayers are with you.  I'm sorry for you.

    If there's anything I can do, don't hesitate to ask!  You can have my eggs, if you want 'em.

  • Well, I for one think you have a very level head and am impressed with how you are coping. I mean, it is super emotional and incredibly hard to deal with, but rather than venting "I am never having children" and giving up, you have formulated a plan of attack and working your way through possibilities. You are not in some fool's paradise, but at the same time you are not willing to lie down and die (so to speak). Good for you. It takes guts and you have them.

    I think you also might get together in a good, solid support group. I know my support group was critical to help me get through one hell of a lot of things. Sometimes worrying about someone else's ovaries and losses meant I could escape worrying about mine. And who gives a crap if everyone says "you should deal with it and not suppress it". You deal with IF every flippin day, and frankly sometimes you want a freakin break from your bod. So yeah, a solid support group is key. And since you have a few months before you get into it, it is a great time to find that support. So the bond is made early on before the rounds of drugs start.

    I hope hope hope the clomid cycles work. I have every finger crossed this does it for you. My group, from what I recall, did averages of 6. So 6 months trying clomid, 6 months with injectables, 6 iui's... that kind of thing. I don't know what your doc recommends, but you mentioned in your OP you were wondering and that's the best info I got on it.

  • I am so sorry that you even have to deal with this, but I am truly hoping that the Clomid is all you need! I think you have a good head regarding all of this and a good plan to work with. Best of luck! 
    [IMG]http://i55.tinypic.com/33esuup.jpg[/IMG]

    <a href="http://www.thebump.com/?utm_source=ticker&utm_medium=HTML&utm_campaign=tickers" title="Parenting Tips"><img src="http://global.thebump.com/tickers/ttfb164.aspx" alt=" Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker" border="0" /></a>
  • image burkems:
    You and James are in my prayers from here on out. Hoping to hear some good news some time next spring. Until then, you've certainly got enough to keep you busy!

    this ((hugs))

  • I am so sorry that you are going through this.  I am glad that you guys have a plan.  I'll keep you in my prayers.
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • You'll be in my prayers. Left Hug

    imageimageimage
    Lilypie Second Birthday tickers
  • Oh Ash. I'm keeping you in my thoughts and prayers, too. If you need ANYTHING, you let me know - I'll be down there in a heartbeat for coffee, wine...whatever.
    [url=http://charmedkindoflife.blogspot.com/].:.Charmed Kind of Life [2.17.13].:.[/url]

    <a href="http://lilypie.com/"><img src="http://lbyf.lilypie.com/qnrpm6.png" width="400" height="80" border="0" alt="Lilypie Kids Birthday tickers" /></a>

    <a href="http://lilypie.com/"><img src="http://lagf.lilypie.com/t967m5.png" width="400" height="80" border="0" alt="Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers" /></a>
  • Sorry to hear you will be having to go through all that. I hope it happens soon for y'all!!
  • image burkems:
    You and James are in my prayers from here on out. Hoping to hear some good news some time next spring. Until then, you've certainly got enough to keep you busy!

    This absolutely!  I admire your positive attitude and willingness to get a game plan going, you are so strong!  And please feel free to chat with us anytime, we are here for you!

    [IMG]http://i53.tinypic.com/vhoyh.jpg[/IMG]

    <a href="http://lilypie.com/"><img src="http://lb1f.lilypie.com/ySzFm6.png" width="400" height="80" border="0" alt="Lilypie First Birthday tickers" /></a>
  • I'm so sorry ya'll have to deal with this. I hope the Clomid works for you. Hugs.
    [IMG]http://i265.photobucket.com/albums/ii211/Blair_Houk/180408_1751056849296_1025100951_31974782_2022142_n-1.jpg[/IMG]
    <a href="http://aaronblaircampbell.blogspot.com" target="blank"> Our Blog</a>
    <a href="http://lilypie.com/"><img src="http://lbdf.lilypie.com/gY03m5.png" width="400" height="80" border="0" alt="Lilypie Pregnancy tickers" /></a><a href="http://lilypie.com/"><img src="http://lb1f.lilypie.com/jV1Pm4.png" width="400" height="80" border="0" alt="Lilypie First Birthday tickers" /></a>
  • I don't know what to write... 

    March 09 Siggy Challenge image Melting Snow... because it means that spring is actually on the way and it's not snowing or cold.
  • Oh Ash, I'm so sorry.  I can only imagine how frustrating this can be. 

     You will be in our prayers for sure.  (huggs)  :)

  • I'm so sorry Ashley.

    You and your DH will definitely be in my thoughts and prayers.  I'm praying it happens fast for you both.  Keep your head up!

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • Ashley, you are truly so inspiring. Your ability to express yourself and look towards the future is nothing short of heroic. I wish you guys every kind of luck, hope, faith, black magic... whatever it takes to make your dreams of a family come true.

    I don't know if you ever lurk/visit any of the TTGP boards on TB, but I've "met" many women with PCOS who are there. Some have had relatively easy success with Clmoid, others are still TTC. But they are a great group of women who you may find comfort in knowing. Not trying to push you or anything like that. I just wanted to let you know...

    image
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker BabyFruit Ticker
    image

    Oct.'13 Siggy Challenge: Cheers to Easter!
Sign In or Register to comment.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards