Cincinnati Nesties
Dear Community,

Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.

If you have questions about this, please email [email protected]

Thank you.

Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.

Is this tacky?

My sister is getting married this year & I'm her co-MOH.  Most of the bridesmaids are young (college aged, 22 at the most) and their idea of a party is a keg or a night at a bar, not sitting around eating finger sandwiches & punch.   I want to do a shower for her but traditional etiquette says that the bride's immediate family shouldn't host a shower.  I've found some modern etiquette guides that say it's ok.

So, is it tacky or not?  Would you be shocked if you were invited to a shower the bride's older sister was hosting?  Or would you only care if you were 80 years old?

 

Visit The Nest!baby development PitaPata Dog tickers image

Re: Is this tacky?

  • Personally, I wouldn't think twice about it, but I'm not one that's known for adhering to "traditional" etiquette. I actually think I've been invited to showers thrown by a sister of the bride. Obviously it didn't horrify me to the point that I bothered to remember it, lol.

    ETA: I would definitely check with the other co-MOH to make sure you're not stepping on any toes and that she didn't already have something planned.

  • I didn't hear this old rule about family not hosting the shower till after I was married.... my mom and aunt hosted mine. Personally I think this "rule" is silly, so I'd go for it and coordinate plans with the other co-MOH.
    image
    The Fluffy Cat says... "Boxes are the best toys ever invented!"
  • I had a man of honor and my older sister was my only other attendant.  She hosted my shower and my other sisters and mom helped.  I don't think it's tacky at all.

    By the way, I was invited to a bachelorette party a few weeks ago and the average age was 14 years younger than me.  Um, thank you but ... no.  So, I know what you mean about the age gap.

     

    image
  • Nope go for it.  In the last wedding I was in the bride's sister (also the MOH) hosted at her house and we (the other BMs) chipped in and helped plan.  That was a little strange though b/c the bride actually made (I helped) and mailed her own invitations (ie: ghost writing sorta).  For my cousin's wedding a few years ago her mom threw the shower.
  • I wouldn't necessarily look at the family side of it exclusively - what are the responsibilities of the MOH in re: to a shower?

    Honestly - unless you're inviting Emily Post, screw the rules and do what makes your sister happy. It's her wedding, not Emily's.

  • My older sister threw a couples shower for us and she was also MOH in our wedding.  My vote: Not tacky!  Very, very thoughtful, actually.  Throw it and have fun!
  • I agree with PP's.  I say go for it.  I don't think its tacky at all!  Happy planning!
    [img]http://tinyurl.com/66bxbsh[/img]

    [url=http://www.thebump.com/?utm_source=ticker&utm_medium=UBB&utm_campaign=tickers][img]http://global.thebump.com/tickers/tt103f60.aspx[/img][/url]
  • Phew!  And yes, screw Emily Post!!  I told the others that I'd worry about the shower & they could worry about the bachelorette party.  My style is more afternoon tea & frilly stuff, not a night of bars & adult toys.  Besides, my sister & I would be mortified to have our mom at a sex_toy party.  Someone has to do something to involve the older people & the little itty bitty ones!
    Visit The Nest!baby development PitaPata Dog tickers image
  • Not tacky at all. Go for it.
  • I wouldn't raise an eye at all that you were hosting one. Honestly, it wouldn't even cross my mind. Throw her a nice shower. 
    Lilypie Fifth Birthday tickers Lilypie Third Birthday tickers
  • image Moesten:
    I wouldn't raise an eye at all that you were hosting one. Honestly, it wouldn't even cross my mind. Throw her a nice shower. 

    I was thinking the exact same thing. 

    Lilypie Fifth Birthday tickers Lilypie First Birthday tickers
  • I hosted a shower for my little sister when she got married last year.  If it was tacky, so be it.  We had fun!
    image image
    Photos courtesy of Jen Rose Photography
    Lilypie Third Birthday tickers Lilypie First Birthday tickers
  • image Megs&Nick:
    I hosted a shower for my little sister when she got married last year.  If it was tacky, so be it.  We had fun!

     

    Unrelated, but I just wanted to say that I love your picture!!

    17
    *** Sisterwife with JenniferLuvsCandy! can't wait to meet your LO!***
    ***Congrats to Kristin15172004 on your adorable baby girl!***
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • My shower was hosted by my MOH and my other bridesmaids which included my sisters. My mother and my mother-in-law also hosted it as well. I personally do not think it's tacky at all and would go ahead with it if I was was in your position.
    image Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Anniversary
  • I'm not an etiquette follower, either.  I must've been super tacky b/c my MOH (my younger sister), my SIL, and my mother all hosted mine.  I would def check w/ the other MOH in your situation and make sure what her plans are, but I'd say its fair game personally.
    Daisypath Anniversary tickers Visit The Nest! PitaPata Cat tickers PitaPata Dog tickers
  • I'm the older sister and threw my sister her shower.  I don't hink anyone actually knows that rule.
    **Vanessa**

    My Blog
  • My mom and aunt threw my shower bc my bridesmaids live all over the state and have small apartments. We had a blast. No one said a thing about it. I say go ahead and through it if it's ok with the other bridesmaids.
    image
    image Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
Sign In or Register to comment.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards