So, my brother is an amazing hybrid of a "black sheep" and "golden boy" in our family. My parents divorced when we were young (bro was 2, I was 5) and my grandfather died the same year. So he was the only male in the family for a long time, and my family is a little nuts about treating men like their sh!t doesn't stink.
Anyway, he is getting married this summer. It is not his first marriage. He has an ex-wife from hell that he married at 20, while he was in the military. She was truly horrible. She lied, stole money from him, drove him into incredible debt and has a violent temper. They have an 8 year old daughter together. When my niece was 18 months old my brother was stationed in Hawaii and his ex chose not to go with him and my brother hasn't seen her since. There were a lot of reasons given, and some are legitimate, but not all of them. He's now close to signing over his parental rights and wanting to just move on with his life. He tells me that he and his FI have plans to have kids in the not-too-distant future and I can't help but think, 'you already have a child!!!'
He's getting married soon, and my mom & grandmother think that all this should just be swept under the rug and we should be thrilled that he's "finally getting it right" after his mistakes from the past. This is incredible to me. How can I just forget? I realize that people make mistakes, and that this was a huge one. He shouldn't be forced to be alone and unhappy for the rest of his life, but I'm just having a really hard time with how people are fawning all over him as though none of this ever happened!
I rarely say anything about how I feel about the whole thing, but I was recently told by my mom that I am hard-hearted and unforgiving and refuse to see him as anything other than an idiot. Apparently, I'm the jerk now. I love my brother. I do. I just can't pretend that none of this happened. Am I being unreasonable to have a little trouble swallowing all this family "joy" I'm supposed to be experiencing?