I am generally a lurker but I had a weird thing happen to me today and I am having a hard time dealing with it. I just need to get it off my chest and hope you guys can give me some insight of what I can do for my mom.
I have an uncle that I have not heard from or seen in 7 years. The last time I saw him was when my mom flew him home for my grandma's funeral. Before my grandma passed away he managed to steal almost $100,000 from her through insurance fraud and using her credit cards. He completely took advantage of her and trashed her house, refinanced it (when it was almost paid off, and took off leaving my mother responsible for all of this debt along with the messes and taking care of the funeral arangements. He was suffering from some mental illnesses and actually put my dad and grandpas lives in danger a few times. My grandpa died a few years before my grandma.
Grandma lived with us until the day she died and I actually went to college classes in high school to work a schedule with my parents so that there was always one of us home to care for grandma. During all of this my uncle had dissappeared and we were just begining to figure out what he had done. He has a lot of mental health problems that are made worse by years of drug use.
Through the years my mom has pretty much avoided him, which has been easy since no one seems to know where he is. Occasionally my mom would get an email or phone call from his ex wife asking if we knew where he was because their son was growing up and asking about him. He pretty much ran away from all of us. A few months ago my mom was looking for him online and believed that she had found him and that he had gotten remarried. I think that she was looking for him because he is all she has left of her family other than us. I know it is hard for her to not have her parents or aunts or uncles anymore.
This morning my mom got a call from a hospital halfway across the country from us saying that someone had dropped off my uncle there and that he was on life support and not expected to make past a few days. No one knows who dropped him off. They said there was a note with my moms name and phone number on it and that was it.
My mom is taking this very hard, She is very upset with how things are between her and her brother and even more hurt that someone could just abandon a dying person at a hospital. It is just all so weird. My mom is of course planning on flying there to be with him and take care of whatever happens to people who do not have funerals. She has contacted the ex-wife and her son (who is now 18.) They are also having a hard time with all of this.
I feel so bad for my mom and don't know what to do or say to her. It has been such a hard past few years for my family and I don't even know how I feel about all this. As much as I hate what he has done to my famliy and how much he hurt my parents and grandparents, no one deserves to die alone like that. After all, in the end family is family. My mom says that if by some chance he makes it through it she wants to have a relationship with him.
I guess it is all just so strange, this stuff only happens in movies! I just needed to vent. Thanks for letting me get it all out.