June 2008 Weddings
Dear Community,

Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.

If you have questions about this, please email [email protected]

Thank you.

Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.

Is it unethical

to NOT wear my wedding ring to job interviews?

Maybe I'm jaded, but I can't help but think that this young married woman thing is working against me in job interviews.  I realize children aren't conducive to my chosen career, I get it, but I feel like its holding me back, like people are thinking I'm going to spit out a baby at any given minute.  I know its illegal to ask about marriage and kids, but they're smart people, they can look at my left hand.

What do you super smart June 08ers think?

Anniversary

Re: Is it unethical

  • Heck no it's not unethical!  Go for it!
    image
  • They definitely notice... I only went on two job interviews, but one specifically asked me about my engagement ring (before we got married). Whether or not it's legal/ ethical of them, they do take note I think.
    Colleen & Matt 6/29/08
    m/c 7/17/10
    Dx: MFI- 3% morph
    IUIs: Gonal-F + Ovidrel + b2b IUI= BFNs
    IVF with ICSI= BFP! EDD 11/25/11
    3/18- Beta #1 452! 3/20- Beta #2 1,026!! 3/27- First u/s- TWINS!
    Our twin boys arrived at 36w5d due to IUGR and a growth discordance
    image
    Lilypie Second Birthday tickers
    Be kinder than necessary, for everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle.
  • I work in a field that doesn't mind if I'm married or have children, so I had never thought about removing my ring. I don't think it's unethical, but do you really want to work at place that doesn't value family? (Sorry, if that sounded like a flame, it's not supposed to) Smile

    image
    Neena Mae. 1/7/10
    "A baby nursing at a mother's breast is an undeniable affirmation of our rootedness in nature." - David Suzuki
    Pregnancy Ticker
  • If you think that's a reason you may not be hired, then I don't think it's unethical to not wear your ring for interviews.
    <img src="http://i52.tinypic.com/kdoqjb.jpg" width="200">

    BFP 6/3/09 * C/P 6/6/09; 8/3/09 * DD 3/27/10; 2/22/11 * EDD 10/31/11
    [url=http://www.thebump.com/?utm_source=ticker&utm_medium=UBB&utm_campaign=tickers][img]http://global.thebump.com/tickers/ttdf972.aspx[/img][/url]
    [url=http://www.thebump.com/?utm_source=ticker&utm_medium=UBB&utm_campaign=tickers][img]http://global.thebump.com/tickers/tta03d3.aspx[/img][/url]
  • image Jennrs:

    I work in a field that doesn't mind if I'm married or have children, so I had never thought about removing my ring. I don't think it's unethical, but do you really want to work at place that doesn't value family? (Sorry, if that sounded like a flame, it's not supposed to) Smile

    You're adorable, not taken as one at all.  And no, preferably I don't want to work for a place that would hold this against me, but at this point I'm getting a tad desparate and less choosy.  And it could just be that I'm underqualified or a bad interviewer...its just a feeling I've had once or twice.

    Anniversary
  • I say go for it, if you think it will help you! Just make sure your ring mark is also gone if you have one. You aren't lying, there are lots of reasons why people don't wear rings (having them cleaned for example). If you get hired and they mention, "oh, I didn't know you were married, you weren't wearing rings at the interview", simply say they were getting cleaned or something.

    But also note, would you really want to work for someone who wouldn't hire you because you were married? If you wouldn't want to work for someone like that, then keep the rings on.

  • If you want to take off your rings for the interview, go ahead!  Just because it's illegal to ask doesn't mean they don't. 

     

    Lilypie Pregnancy tickers
  • Well, for starters, I don't ever wear my rings to work. I work in an inner city police department. I don't like the clientele here so I don't ever wear them. No, I don't think it's unethical not to wear your rings to an interview. I don't think that your status is defined by the jewelry you wear. It's how you wear your heart and what's in it.... :)
  • I don't think it's unethical. 

    If they came out and asked out if you were married (which is unethical during a job interview, I think) and you answered falsely - I'd say that would be unethcial. 

    I know what you mean though.  I've had several people tell me that if a man and a woman with the same qualifications interviewed for a job they'd hire the man because the woman "might have a baby one day".  I'm glad those weren't the men who hired me.

  • IMO it is not unethical but Jennrs has an excellent point.
    Married in 2008 - DD born in 2010 - EDD 6.15.2012!
  • I don't think it's unethical at all and to play devil's advocate if an employer has two equally qualified employees and one is married and one is not and they go w/ the one not married, that doesn't necessarily make the employer a dbag. Times are rough and it can be difficult and expensive to cover the time people are gone I'm sure.
    Happiest place on Earth!
    image
  • It's not unethical to leave them off, I don't think.  But, it IS unethical for them to make assumptions, ask questions or discriminate on the basis of your status (married/single).  Given that, I tend to agree with Jennrs.
  • I also want to say it may do the opposite. People may view it as you being more stable and less likely to get up and move if they know you are married/have a family
Sign In or Register to comment.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards