April 2008 Weddings
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DH wants to tell now

Art is insistant that we tell our families now and not wait till Christmas.  I told him I didn't want to tell everyone until after the first trimester because  I am scared.  I dont want to get everyones hope up and then something happen.  Art answer...well if that happens we just try again. He is right.  I can't control what happens. 

He wanted to tell everyone on Saturday.  I convinced him to wait until after the first appointment.  Ok now I need to come up with a creative idea now.

Re: DH wants to tell now

  • my thought on waiting to tell is this:

    what if something does happen?  would you not tell your family and pretend like nothing happened?  there's no way i could do that.  you would need their love and support through it.  so, whether you tell them now or wait, and god forbid something was to happen, they'd find out either way, right?

    but, it 's totally your decision.  do what you feel more comfortable with.

    congrats again!  i'm so very happy for you.

  • Yes, I would tell them if something happened.  I am probably being dumb...I am sooo superstitious (sp) it's ridiculous!
  • I'm with Tiffany.  I post on Pregosaur and if you read way back to the beginning Bibliosaur (not be) talks about telling her family she's pregnant.  She had a miscarriage earlier this year and she said the worst thing in the world wasn't telling her father she was pregnant and then losing the baby.  It was NOT telling him she was pregnant and then later having to tell him he was almost a Grandfather.  She worded it differently, but in a way that really made sense.

    Here's my theory: You are not planning to have a miscarriage, right?  So don't plan like you're going to have a miscarriage.  Waiting just keeps your mind open to the possibility.  If everyone knows you have the support and love from your friends and family which will be helpful in early pregnancy especially.  And if God forbid anything happens, you have their love and support then, too.

    But I'm also a very open person.  If you're a private person this may not be ideal for you.  So go with what you are personally comfortable with.

  • Personally, I would tell my parents and siblings but I don't know if I'd open it up to Aunts/Uncles/Cousins etc until after the first Trimester. I definitely wouldnt tell friends until after the first trimester.

    And I say all of this but I'm horrible with secrets so when it happens to me it'll probably all fly right out the window lol

  • I can understand your DH's excitement.  I don't think you should tell everyone.  Just close family.  And I agree with planning for a positive pregnancy. No need to worry about anything negative.  I would tell my parents and best friend only.  I don't think I'd be able to keep it to myself.  I can't even imaging keeping TTC to myself.

    BTW - I'm not sure if I told you congratulations so CONGRATULATIONS!!!!  Wink

  • i agree with pp's. Tell close family and just let them know your concerns about m/c and that you'd like to keep it a secret from anyone else just in case god forbid something happen.


  • I agree that you should wait until the first appointment as well but then tell your immediate family (parents, siblings) and your best friend in case you need to talk about things or if god forbid something happens. 
    Visit The Nest! BabyFruit Ticker married 4/19/2008
  • I agree with you girls! Parents, siblings & best friend will know next week. I know I can't lie to my best friend. I called her last night & she asked how all the testing was going. I could lie to her on the phone. In person she is going to see right through my lies. lol Now I need a creative way to tell them. I asked for ideas on my local board. Someone suggested onies that said I'm Thankful for my Grandma & Grandpa. And one for step daughter. Or a save the date card. My idea was to hand out 4th of July Invitations.
  • We told Family and Close friends right away because we knew we would want the support if something happened. But I agree wait till after the first Appt that what we did. It's going to be great no matter when you tell them!
  • Give them invites to a surprise party for the due date location of hospital. I thinl that would be different and cute!
  • I waited to tell after I heard Lo's heartbeat.  That was just our preference.  Oh my momsies !!

     Congrats again Becky !!! 

  • Since you are so talented, why don't you make bibs for your parents. Saying World's best Grandma, World's best Grandpa.

    Grandma's little firecracker

    I am the new leaf in the family tree



    |My Food Blog|

  • The only reason I would wait is that once you tell people they like to ask you every day how you are doing blah, blah, blah and that makes time seem to go soooooo much shorter. Wink 

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