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Moving in With Relative

My family and i have moved cross country while my boyfriend (of 2 years) lives in the state my aunt does. We are struggling financially and things are very unstable right now. I want to ask my mom and aunt if i can go live with my aunt but i don't know how and when to ask both of them so that they will say yes. I am 16 and not a moody teenager. Please help me and please no criticism.

Re: Moving in With Relative

  • Marzzy said:
    My family and i have moved cross country while my boyfriend (of 2 years) lives in the state my aunt does. We are struggling financially and things are very unstable right now. I want to ask my mom and aunt if i can go live with my aunt but i don't know how and when to ask both of them so that they will say yes. I am 16 and not a moody teenager. Please help me and please no criticism.
    Honey you are only 16 years of age!

    You will have other boyfriends. This is the time of your life where you are supposed to be "free and unencumbered" and testing the dating waters and having FUN!

    So you more or less want to get away from your mom and go live in the state your aunt is in....

    Because some boy is there???

    WRONG reason to do it.

    Stay where you are --- for you to go live with a relative is not legally easy. Your aunt will more or less have to be your legal guardian; you just cannot "go live there" --- if something happens to you, she needs to be your "next of kin" legally; your mother would not be close enough to do that.

    Stay where you are.

    You are old enough to get a part time job and help out at home financially that way --- there are fast food jobs, retail, wait staff jobs and other jobs where teenagers are the ideal candidates to hire.

    You have 2 more years of high school left and 2 more years to adulthood. Use them wisely. Don't even consider or think about asking to move to your aunt's house. GL.
    short+sassy
  • VORVOR member
    Eighth Anniversary 500 Love Its 500 Comments Name Dropper
    I'm 100% w/ Tarpon.  Stay where you are, focus on school.  Get a PT job to help out.
  • I'll go a little against the grain here and suggest you talk to your parents about this first.  They may flat out just not allow you to move.

    Although you mention a b/f in your post, I'm assuming it's more you miss where you were.  I think that would be really tough to move to a different high school when you are only within two years of graduating anyway.  I would have been despondent over that, b/f or not.  Talk to your parents about this.  Don't make your b/f the focus of it.  Think ahead of time of the positives of moving back to where you were and bring up these points.  Be ready to discuss how you will help your aunt, ie with chores, p/t job to chip in money.

    I hate to bring up money but, quite frankly, if you moved in with your aunt she could require your parents to pay her child support.  Which it sounds like they are not in a position to pay.  So you better be ready and willing to pick up a p/t job with a good bit of hours and plan to turn the majority of that money over to her, in order to help her if she agrees to take you in.

    However, if truly the only reason you want to move is because of the b/f, the other PPs are right.  I'm not doubting the seriousness of or the love in your relationship, just because of your ages.  But the fact of the matter is, you are both in transitional phases of life and you shouldn't be moving just for him.

    If your parents are okay with the idea of you living with your aunt, they are the ones who should broach this subject with her first because they are your guardians.  I'm an aunt who lives halfway across the country from my niece.  Although she is currently in elementary school, there is NO WAY I would allow her at any point to live with me before she was out of high school.  It's nothing personal against her, she's awesome and I love her, but I would be very uncomfortable taking on that kind of responsibility.

    Now, once she has graduated and if she happens to want to go to a college near me, then  I would be more open to her moving in with me.

    TarponMonoxide
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