HI, Im new here. I NEED some advice.
My childrens father and I broke up 2 years ago. I broke up with him because he stopped helping and started drinking A LOT. All day, and I would come home after a long day at work to find him passed out in a drunken slumber. He didnt help with our 2 children who were very young at the time. I got fed up and moved in with family who live 3 hours away.
The problem is he has not came to visit us in 2 years! The kids are 3 and 4 and the youngest doesn't remember him. He doesn't pay child support, or send any gifts on birthdays or holidays. Even though he works and makes good money.
He recently started calling me often and we reestablished a friendship. He made promises to be a parent and contribute. He said he wants to be back with me and misses me. We started talking daily and finally upon my own interrogation he confessed that he lives with his new girlfriend and her 3 kids! I am heart broken and disappointed.
At Christmas he got her kids gifts but didnt send our kids anything. He still calls me and says he loves me. We talk every day and sometimes he calls me when she falls asleep...He has even talked about how he would cheat on her with me if I were closer. I feel horrible like I'm the "other woman". He said the only reason he started dating her is because he thought we were completely over even though he knew he still had feelings for me. So, now I feel so confused. He said he knows he should break up with his girlfriend because its unfair to her that he still has feelings for me, BUT he says breaking up with her would be mean and he wouldnt want to do her like that.
Am i demeaning myself by still talking to him??? I say I am gonna stop talking to him but he is my childrens father and its SO SO hard. I have this hope that somehow it will work out... or maybe somehow I can make him do right by me and the kids...... He wants me to move near him but Im so afraid that he will just be trying to have his cake and eat it too....
This is so embarrassing for me , and I thank u all for taking the time to read it.