When DH and I were dating, we knew we wanted kids.
We were married in 2004, fresh out of college. We were not going to TTC right away. We had friends who had done that who were divorced, unable to buy a home, unhappy in their careers, etc. We wanted to get our lives started first. I am so glad we did. I think if we had had a kid right away we would be divorced now. We weren’t ready and we knew it.
We were each busy with our careers, sorting out purchasing a home, job changes, a couple moves, etc. The economy slowed around the year 2007 or so (was it 2008?), there were a lot of layoffs and we were lucky to have jobs. So we plugged along, but there wasn’t a lot of chance to be promoted or change jobs. When the economy finally loosened up, DH and I both changed jobs around early 2012.
We were now talking seriously about a timeline to TTC. We were happier in our careers and we weren’t getting any younger.
The spring of 2012, I got off of BCP for the first time after about 10 years on them. It wasn’t that bad actually. My cycles were normal within a few months. We were still preventing.
I waited until I had been at my job for long enough to qualify for FMLA and we started TTC. It didn’t take long. I can’t decide if the first month “counts” or not (due to timing). Anyway, we were PG within about one to two months of TTC.
It’s kind of a funny story. Not sure if I can tell it in a funny way online here. Anyway, the month we actually got PG, I wasn’t temping, but I had a pretty good read on my cycles due to timing them since coming off BCP about eight months earlier. And my cycles were longish but regular (only varied by about a day). Well, I tested when I thought I should have and it came back negative.
DH was disappointed and decided we needed to “redouble our efforts” he came up with an elaborate ST schedule (yes, really) and decided that “this would do the trick” (no knows nothing about fertility or timing or a cycle or anything, so I found this particularly amusing). I wasn’t worried because I knew it could easily take us a year. I told myself I wasn’t even going to start “worrying” until about six months into TTC. DH normally doesn’t ask about my cycles at all, but all of a sudden he was asking me once (twice?) a day when I was going to get my period because he wanted to implement his “schedule”.
Well, one day (Friday after Thanksgiving) he was bugging me again and I thought “actually, I *should* have gotten my period”, so I took a test. It was a very very very faint line (a real “squinter”). I couldn’t tell. I came out of the bathroom holding the stick and asked DH if he saw anything. He said he didn’t see anything. But I knew a “line is a line” and I knew I needed to re-test in the AM. I tested in the AM with FMU and it was a +. I told DH and we were so excited.
We each told a couple friends, but we kept it very secret. On Christmas/Christmas Eve we told our families. We picked out picture frames and printed a poem to go in them and wrapped them for each family member. We placed our Mom’s present under the tree and hid the others. My Mom cried and cried when she opened it. DH’s Mom was also excited when she opened hers (we do Christmas Eve with my family and Christmas Day with DH’s). It was a very memorable Christmas for me. I will treasure that chance to surprise them.
We did an official “announcement” after the 12 week NST results to everyone else. I told my boss right away but the rest of work at about 20 weeks or so.