Buying A Home
Dear Community,

Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.

If you have questions about this, please email [email protected]

Thank you.

Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.

Bedroom location - concern or no?

DH and I went and looked at a house yesterday that is a very old farmhouse with a number of additions over the years. Because of this, there are weird bedroom sizes and locations. First of all, it lists as being three bedrooms, but it's really two with a tiny office type thing that's barely large enough for a twin bed. The first real room is on the first floor and is in the very back of the house. The master bedroom is the only thing upstairs (the staircase leads right to the door and that's all that's there). DH and I got talking about this, and I have some concerns. We do not have any children now, but when we do, would it be a bad idea to have a child's room on another level AND the opposite side of the house? It's not a huge house, less than 1500 sq ft, but the bedroom seems like a long way for a sick young child to walk in the middle of the night. I'm also thinking of children being older too.... A teen child could totally sneak in/out without waking a parent because the downstairs room is very close to the main door. I guess I am having a hard time imagining what life would be like since growing up my room was right across from my parents.

Another thing is with the tiny room. DH pointed out that the downstairs bedroom is certainly big enough for two beds if we had two kids. I reminded him that only works if they are the same sex. What happens if we have a second child and it's not the same as the first? The tiny room measures 8x7. That just seems like too small of a room for a child to grow up in. Thoughts? DH says I'm being paranoid and thinking about it too hard. Are these legit concerns?
Critter015

Re: Bedroom location - concern or no?

  • As the parent of a teen, that arrangement would definitely not work for me.
  • As the parent of a teen, that arrangement would definitely not work for me.
  • If this is a house you plan to be in long term, I wouldn't buy it. Even if you're only planning to be there for the short term, I still wouldn't buy it actually (just in case something happened and you ended up there for a lot longer than planned). That does not sound like a good house to raise a family in for the reasons you've listed. DH and I have talked about this quite a bit, actually, and having all/most of bedrooms on the same floor is important to both of us so that we can be close to our (future) children.
    Life is good today.
  • CowgirlK39CowgirlK39 member
    Fourth Anniversary 100 Comments Name Dropper 5 Love Its
    edited December 2013
    DH and I tried to talk about it some more and he insists it's not that big of a deal. He says if we keep worrying about things like that we will never find the right place. I like the rest of the house but the bedroom situ just worries me.
  • This was a total deal breaker for my husband and I . We wanted all the bedrooms to be near each other. I especially would not be ok with my child's bedroom being on the ground floor and mine upstairs. What if someone broke in ? Or a fire ? I know it's a lot of what ifs, but I also knew it was something I could never be ok with. We passed on a couple otherwise perfect houses for that reason.
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    moonprincessd
  • Yes, it would be a concern for me too.  We are currently in our starter home, upgrading to our "next phase" home closing next month.  In this home, we have had 3 kids.   We have 3 bedrooms and the master & two other bedrooms are on opposite sides of the house (but its more of a straight shot) rather than tucked away.  While it hasn't posed any issues at any age we have gone through, we did opt for a home that had all four bedrooms together.  I, too, was thinking fires even tho my oldest is 8. It wasn't a chance I really wanted to take.  We also discounted any homes that had 3 bdrms plus a study (despite our boys sharing a room).  We wanted room to spread out (not with any more kids tho).  There was a house that we almost LOVED however all 4 bedrooms were the same size (mostly together) and shared one bathroom upstairs (another bathroom downstairs).  That was a deal breaker for us too because we were thinking to the teen years.  Do we really want to share a bathroom with 3 teens? We also hated that the master wasn't really a master (typical for 1920's homes tho).  I know it's hard to tell now but it sounds like you are making forever plans for a home.  Is there any chance you'd be able to move in the future? If its a forever home, I'd def be looking to have the house I'd want for the family I want (even though the best laid plans...).  If there is a good chance this is just a starter home, then I'd be a little more lax.  Our oldest two (girl then boy) shared a room for 2 years and it was NBD.  DH had a office in the other bedroom until #3 came, then the boys moved in together.  DD got her own room.  I would be uncomfortable with them sharing a room now.   Anywho, best of luck to you.   We looked at 30+ homes before we decided.  
    Turning 3!!!
    image
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • I have a 3 1/2 year old, a 22 month old and a 5 month old. I have to get up at least once per night to help someone with something. There is no way I would buy a home with the bedrooms like you have described, UNLESS I had the funds to immediately make a renovation or an addition to get what I wanted in the bedroom lay out. What you have described is a parenting logistical nightmare IMHO.
  • I'd just keep looking. Doesn't sound good with all these concerns already.
  • The bedroom locations would be a deal breaker to me.  Layout of a house is very important.
    moonprincessd
  • I can't get my husband to accept that this bedroom set up is not ideal. He grew up in a mobile home and shared a bedroom with his brother most of his life so he thinks this place is a mansion. The other issue we have is that we have some specific property requirements that are hard to come by. He is a volunteer firefighter and needs to stay within his district so that limits us, but we both agree we insist on large acreage properties. We will accept nothing less than 5 acres, ideally anything above ten. So finding a place that is in the district and large property is hard. This home fits all of that but the bedroom are just...ick. We talked to a good friend yesterday who lives in a home with the master bedroom downstairs and the kids rooms up. He said he never ever had an issue or a concern. The realtor called and asked what our thoughts are and I haven't gotten back to her yet. I am so conflicted.
  • I can't get my husband to accept that this bedroom set up is not ideal. He grew up in a mobile home and shared a bedroom with his brother most of his life so he thinks this place is a mansion. The other issue we have is that we have some specific property requirements that are hard to come by. He is a volunteer firefighter and needs to stay within his district so that limits us, but we both agree we insist on large acreage properties. We will accept nothing less than 5 acres, ideally anything above ten. So finding a place that is in the district and large property is hard. This home fits all of that but the bedroom are just...ick. We talked to a good friend yesterday who lives in a home with the master bedroom downstairs and the kids rooms up. He said he never ever had an issue or a concern. The realtor called and asked what our thoughts are and I haven't gotten back to her yet. I am so conflicted.
    I think you need to order your priorities.  Is there a reason you want at least 5 acres?  Are there houses that meet the layout/bedrooms but with less acreage that you can at least look at to compare?  This might help your DH get a different perspective on the layout.

    Honestly, if you are conflicted, I would pass on this house.  You BOTH want to love it, or else someone is going to have regrets.  Not sure about your area, but by me there's not much inventory in the winter.  Can you wait until spring when the housing inventory should pick up and you'll have more to look at?
  • We want the large acreage because we are outdoorsy people who hunt, ride four wheelers and all sorts of fun rural stuff. That's huge for us. We are just panicking because we just do not know how many properties that fit our requirements there will be in this little area we have to stay in. Do we take advantage of this property and just deal with the bedrooms or do we not and hope something else comes up?
  • i honestly would give up the idea of having that much yard space.  unless you build your home, you always have to comprise on something. it sounds like your house search is suffering for a "want" instead of a "need".
    moonprincessd
  • I would probably pass on this house because even if it would work for you, as you can see by pp's, it will limit your resale ability significantly.
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • moonprincessdmoonprincessd member
    100 Comments 25 Love Its Name Dropper First Answer
    edited February 2014
    I would pass, having a kid on a separate floor = tons of time walking up and down stairs. And in their teens it would = easier to sneak out of the house. 

    Also it would be hard to resale, unless you do some major remodeling or tear it down and start again.

    There are plenty of houses out there, I'm sure you'll find one eventually that's better. We looked at a lot before picking ours. 


  • sounds like you're not happy with this option, keep looking. something perfect may come on the market further down the road. 

    Me: 28 H: 30
    Married 07/14/2012
    TTC #1 January 2015
    BFP! 3/27/15 Baby Girl!! EDD:12/7/2015
  • I understand how a large plot of land can be a need.  We're the same way.  Not everyone is going to understand it as a "need"... but we know it is!!!  :) 

    Anyway, about the house... would there be room in your budget to add a master on ground level?  If not now, then at some point in the future? 

    If you don't have babies yet, remember they can sleep in the room with you for a while... and a small child could certainly grow up in a room that was 7*8 feet.  The pioneers lived in one room sod houses!  

    In my opinion, opposite sex children can share a room for a loooooong time before it becomes an issue.

    If acreages are really hard to come by where you are (like they are here), I would look closely and think hard... because teenagers are going to figure out ways to sneak out even with you sleeping in the same room!

    TTC #1 since 10/2006 Lap shows stage 1 Endo
  • Thanks for all the input girls. It ended up just not working out. We attempted to look into the mortgage for it and things just seemed a bit... off? Some of the numbers run by the broker didn't make sense. The realtor got a bit pushy so we told her to forget it and just keep looking. The right one will come along some day I suppose.

    I'm glad someone else understands the acreage thing.... its a must for us. I cannot imagine living on anything less than 5 acres, and even that seems tight. We considered looking at a house recently on 3.5 acres but the woods behind it are all owned by someone we know so its not as bad but that didn't work out either.

  • As a parent with one young child and another on the way I wouldn't want a house that had the kids on another floor.
Sign In or Register to comment.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards