Relationships
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Maybe a problem???

I recently started a new job and before I actually went on the floor (i'm in the medical profession) I had to go to training with one other girl. We didn't know each other so at first I thought "oh maybe I can meet a new friend." Well as we were in the car talking about each other (just getting to know one another) she mentioned she was married for about 10 years and has 2 kids. No problem. I told her I was a newlywed only at the time being married for 2 months to my husband. So as we were driving she tells me that this was going to be hard for her husband because he has never really been alone with the kids alone for that great amount of time. However, it got to the point where everytime we would go to the training center (we were set up in hotels by the company and had to commute to the training center) she would tell me that she would argue with her husband when she got back to her room. I tried to reassure her that maybe it is actually hard on him because there isn't two parents at the house and there is only one so it can be stressful for him. I told her that sometimes my husband procrastinates and gets off track on things whch is natural for some.

 

here is where the problem lies. the second week of training we went up to the hotel in her car and my husband dropped me off. that week that we were going to the training center she would sometimes ask me if i talked to mike on the phone and how he was doing (she only met him once and that was when he dropped me off). I respond and say yes, because we did talk about what we did after class. However, now all of a sudden sometimes when i talk to her about something that Mike did or something that the both of us did she all of a sudden is alert and ready to listen. I don't know if she is just having problems with her own marriage or wants to intervene with mine. She has never had any contact with my husband but i feel she might want to make a pass on him and try to intervene in our marriage. what do you think?

Re: Maybe a problem???

  • I think you're jumping to conclusions.

    YOur best bet: from here on in, keep this as a professional relationship. She sounds needy and she is a bit of a pill.
  • Honestly, I think you are overthinking this. I don't see any major red flags.
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  • It sounds like she likes to talk about her family and husband a lot, so when you bring up yours she might feel a connection with you. She finds her home life interesting (thus why she is sharing everything) and probably likes to hear from you about your home life too.

    I would definitely not jump to the conclusion she has the hots for your man. I mean it sounds like you don't really know her, and I wouldn't take her listening to you about your home life as a sign of this. 

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  • I think the woman just wants a friend to talk to.

     

    Worry about this when and if she ever actually makes a pass at him. 

  • I think she is trying to bond with you. If you had kids she would focus on that. I have always asked how someone's partner or spouse is even if I have never met them. It's polite and something I was raised to do. 

    Her and her H maybe fighting with all the travel she is doing. It's a new routine for them and it is hard with kids.  

  • I think you may be being a little overprotective. Even if she is a little jealous of your marriage, she has no opportunity to make a pass at you H, nor do you have to let her intervene in you marriage. If it makes you uncomfortable, distance yourself from her, and don't mention your DH.

    It's natural to want to protect what's yours, especially in the newlywed stage. Some woman gave my H elevator eyes int eh grocery store one day and I wanted to punch her. Then I realized I was beign ridiculous and H and I had a good giggle about it.

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  • She does not want to make a pass at your husband she is just upset about her marriage and how her husband is reacting and probably just wants to hear about yours because he seems to be accepting of what you are doing.  She might even be a little bit jealous that he is so nice about it but she is definitely not trying to make a pass at him.  You have no need to worry just provide a sympathetic ear to her when she needs to vent about her own husband.
    Abraswell
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