Sorry this is so long. =(
Rewind: Found out my FH was into watching porn on a regular (almost daily) basis. I told him it really bothered me and wished for him to stop. He promised me he would stop.
Fast Forward 2 months or so: He received a virus on his computer that sent out multiple emails to multiple people. It turns out he did not keep his promise to me, and was watching porn behind my back. Not only that, he read articles such as "How to Satisfy (and Keep) a Man," and "5 Signs He Doesn't Love You." The girls on the porn sites also wouldn't be enough for him, as he Googled the girls separately to find more erotic pictures of them.
I will admit, I have no sex drive. The watching porn affects me, and it is very difficult for me to have sex knowing that he broke his promise and continued to watch porn behind my back. When I initially confronted him about the porn, I told him it affected my sex drive. He didn't care though. He claims that because we haven't had sex within the past two weeks, he had to turn to it.... But it hasn't been within the past two weeks. He was watching it before per his Internet History. I knew about this but I did not confront him and, in turn, it affected my libido and desire to have any form of intimacy with him. I figured he would stop. He knew he was breaking the promise. He knew he was doing it behind my back.
When I finally confronted him (Friday night, 3/9), I asked him straight up and gave him the chance to be honest with me. When he lied to my face, I felt another hard blow to the stomach. I can't fathom that. He knew the answer. When he lied, I grabbed the piece of paper I wrote his past 7 days of porn history on and shoved it into his chest. He then came forward, but only because he was caught. He also admitted that since we have been arguing lately, he was confused. That's why he looked up the article on "5 Signs He Doesn't Love You."
It sucks because while I was spending my free time looking at stupid, fake flowers for a money box, songs for the last dance at our wedding, and ordering stupid, yellow unity sand, he spent his free time hiding out, watching porn, and being confused about something I was so sure of.
In addition, he has emotional controlling issues. Because of his insecurities, he believes that we have to do EVERYTHING together because we are a couple. And that's not true. Being in a relationship doesn't mean that you have to give up your independence. And he demanded that (and I will quote him) "The only male figure you should have contact with is your father." He claimed his emotions got the best of him during a fight, and that is why he said that. But I don't believe him. He is suspicious EVERY TIME I have some form of contact with the opposite sex; whether it be a friend or co-worker. His controlling behaviors stem from past relationships because his ex-girlfriends supposedly cheated on him. All I can figure is that he is trying to control me so that history won't repeat itself. But in all honesty, you can't judge another person because of someone else's failures. It's not fair to them; it's not fair to ME. I have confronted him about this and he does admit to having a controlling problem.
My parents don't want me to have anything to do with him and so does my best friend. These are the only two people I have told everything to. I don't talk to anyone else I know, personally, about my problems.
He has agreed to do counseling. Right now we can't do couples counseling because of our work hours so, for the moment, he is going to seek counseling alone. But in all honesty, I am concerned that not all issues will be confronted, and that's the reason I want to go with him. He has also moved out of my house at my request. I just can't live under the same roof as someone who disrespected me like that.
The bottom line is that if he doesn't change, there's no future for us. But if he does somehow miraculously change, then I may be willing to give him a chance but it will be VERY difficult. I just feel so torn with my parents wants. I know parents are mostly right every time. I just don't know what to do.