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vent: comment about my kid

I was at an indoor playground this weekend and this mom recognized me from a storytime we've gone to several times.  She's a total loudmouth and part of the reason I don't frequent that storytime.  So anyway, she says to me, "Hey aren't you the mom of that skinny little boy who goes to the ivpl storytime?"  I was like "yeah, hi, blah blah" but wanted to punch her for calling my boy skinny.

However, now I'm worried that he's too skinny and I wish they made protein shakes for toddlers.  Just kidding about that last part.  Sort of.  Man, I never understood how much having a kid is like every vulnerability exposed until having one.

agorabymiriam.etsy.com

Re: vent: comment about my kid

  • I feel you. I get (probably irrationally) angry when people refer to dd as "chubby". I know the comments are not made with malice and chubby babies are cute.  I think it has to do with the fact that I had weight issues my whole life and do not want her to go through any of that. I understand this makes me sound a bit cray cray.
  • skinny little boy?  i wouldn't give her a second thought.  how old is your little one?  my oldest now about to turn 4 NEVER ATE.  i remember sitting at the table and crying...lol.  the pedi said to me, "she will eat when she is hungry" and guess what?  he was right.  she is still a terrible eater and looks like a string bean but will eat when she feels like it.

     as a mom, you do your best and take your lo to his reg sched pedi appts.  if your doc has never mentioned anything i would not worry.  my youngest at 19 months is still under 25% for weight and height but the growth curve goes the rihght way and thats what they look at.  she eats like a HORSE...lol.  at this point she is just petite, built entirely different from her sister.

    not to ramable, but each kid is different and will eat at their own pace.  i just make every effort to make what they eat count...does that make sense?

    dont sweat it...i have learned that being a mommy is like a mother lioness with her cubs...don't eff with them or we'll attack ;p

     

    i spent my childhood with tooth pick legs and looking malnourished...now NOT the case...LOL'

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  • when people call my cat fat my response is she says the same thing about you. i will have to work on what i will say to people about calling my kid skinny/fat/strong etc. 

    i hear you though she could have just said HEY i know you from storytime!  

  • since honesty is in...mirpete should have replied, "oh yeah and i remember you from your BIG MOUTH!"  lmbo ;p

    lachute...u crack me up

     

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  • Lachute - that's a good comeback. I wish I would've thought of it!

    Josh is 2 1/2 and eats really well most of the time and the peds aren't worried.  And his sister is the opposite, totally chubby.  However, both are well within the norm and I know they're healthy so I have to try to ignore the comment.  But you're so right about the lioness thing.  That's exactly how I felt!

    agorabymiriam.etsy.com
  • oh and let me add just under 25% for weight and height but 78% for her head...LOL.  i left the appt asking myself, "is her head that big?" 
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  • I have a little stringbean, too. He's in the 20% percentile for weight (his big head is in the 70%). As long as your pedi isn't worried and he's proportionate, it's fine. DS doesn't like to eat much either and his dr said the same thing..."he'll eat when he's hungry"

    It's still annoying when people make comments, though. 

    ETA: Our pediatrician said that a lot of parents try to fatten up their kids, when they're perfectly fine the way they are. He said you also don't want to encourage bad eating habits (like eating more food when you're not even hungry or already full).  

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  • To make an average some kids are bigger some are smaller. 
  • JD was small and the pedi recommended giving him some Carnation breakfast in his milk every day for some added calories and vitamins. We started that around 18 months and he still drinks it twice a day and loves it.

    and don't worry about what she said, she probably didnt even realize it 

    David John 4.19.01
    Jonathan Dean 4.5.08
    Anna Capri 5.4.11
  • totally hear you. Max is small, which is weird because he was so big when he was born. the pedi isn't worried-he's just "leveling out" and he's fine. But yes, every little thing anyone says has me second guessing if I'm doing anything right. Also, add in to the mix anyone who talks about how tall, heavy, big their amazing eater babies who are the smartest baby ever who hit every milestone before anyone else's baby, and it can make you go crazy.
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  • image meldot:
    totally hear you. Max is small, which is weird because he was so big when he was born. the pedi isn't worried-he's just "leveling out" and he's fine. But yes, every little thing anyone says has me second guessing if I'm doing anything right. Also, add in to the mix anyone who talks about how tall, heavy, big their amazing eater babies who are the smartest baby ever who hit every milestone before anyone else's baby, and it can make you go crazy.

    If I hear the phrase "my baby is so advanced" one more time, I might punch a wall.

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  • image eSynergy:

    If I hear the phrase "my baby is so advanced" one more time, I might punch a wall.

    But they ARE!!!!  Stick out tongue

    LOL.  I think we should start to keep a tally.  

  • yep- i've gotten the skinny comment.  and apparently its caused by me only breastfeeding him and not giving him "real" baby food since it doesn't come out of a jar.  thank baby jesus in golden booties it wasn't said directly to my face and i only overheard it or i may be in jail.  there was lots of deep breaths and counting to about a bazillion for me not to lose my temper.
    image
  • My kid is almost 15 months and does not walk.  He just started take one or two tentative steps.  People actually are really assholes about it.  I have been asked more than once if I am "worried".

    Meanwhile, no one gives a *** when I say "But he can stack six blocks".    

    I hate people. 

    Baby Numbers 11.8.10 The Sequel on or around 10.13.12
  • image eSynergy:

    image meldot:
    totally hear you. Max is small, which is weird because he was so big when he was born. the pedi isn't worried-he's just "leveling out" and he's fine. But yes, every little thing anyone says has me second guessing if I'm doing anything right. Also, add in to the mix anyone who talks about how tall, heavy, big their amazing eater babies who are the smartest baby ever who hit every milestone before anyone else's baby, and it can make you go crazy.

    If I hear the phrase "my baby is so advanced" one more time, I might punch a wall.

    Me too.  If I hear, aww she's so tiny one more time...or someone stare incredulously at her when I say how old she is...I will scream, or cry.  

    It's hard enough to not compare your kids to everyone else without other people doing it for you.

    I'm sure he's totally fine. 

  • image amy052006:

    My kid is almost 15 months and does not walk.  He just started take one or two tentative steps.  People actually are really assholes about it.  I have been asked more than once if I am "worried".

    Meanwhile, no one gives a *** when I say "But he can stack six blocks".    

    I hate people. 

    Emma didn't take any steps until 15 months.  The doc said they don't "worry" until 18 months.  He is fine.

    Emma can still only do like 4 blocks on a good day.  I'm impressed. 

  • image amy052006:

    My kid is almost 15 months and does not walk.  He just started take one or two tentative steps.  People actually are really assholes about it.  I have been asked more than once if I am "worried".

    Meanwhile, no one gives a *** when I say "But he can stack six blocks".    

    I hate people. 

    Here's the thing when a kid is a good crawler like yours I think they are less likely to walk younger. Milo sucked big time crawling and I swear to baby Jesus that is why he walked younger. I certainly didn't practice or encourage. 

  • my kid just did our taxes for us AND we're getting a $1k refund. so all the other babies can suck it, trebek.
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  • I feel like I have ginormo-baby so we are fortunate that we don't typically get comments about height/weight.

    The only time someone has said something that bothered me was when I showed a coworker the baby's 'school' (daycare) picture. She said, "Wait, didn't you know she had pictures that day?"  Apparently she didn't think I dressed my kid up sufficiently for her pictures. 

     

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  • ohmy LD.  Momma would smack for that sort of comment.  What a bitshy comment - even if she didn't mean it that way (I hope).  Josh didn't crawl until later either.  I'm with Lachute - he could crawl so fast, why walk?  Once he started walking though it was all over.  After I was done worrying about that it was/is his speech.  I swear there will always be something, but somehow we all turned out to be productive, responsible contributors to society, so I'm sure our kids will.
    agorabymiriam.etsy.com
  • This post has made Me aware that I have no idea how many blocks my kid can stack and I didn't know I should be counting.  Fail 976531359 as a mom lol
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  • image Shannon1110:
    This post has made Me aware that I have no idea how many blocks my kid can stack and I didn't know I should be counting.  Fail 976531359 as a mom lol

    I only know this because Iooked down at a pile he stacked yesterday and was all "Holy ***".  It was high enough that I noticed.

    Baby Numbers 11.8.10 The Sequel on or around 10.13.12
  • People are so ignorant with their comments. My oldest (7yo) was and still is a horrible eater, but she's always been the 5th%ile. As long as they aren't dropping %iles, they are in good shape. But people always say things about her and I especially hate it now that she's old enough to understand! My youngest on the other hand is an eating machine and a chubby little girl. Oh, and neither of them walked until after 15mos. And I wasn't encouraging it!
  • Awe, i'm sure she didn't mean to offend you.  Is he skinny?  It maybe her quickest way to describe him if he wasn't standing there next to you?  What would you have preferred she refer to him as (i'm assuming she didn't know his name)
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  • image 266psyche:
    Awe, i'm sure she didn't mean to offend you.  Is he skinny?  It maybe her quickest way to describe him if he wasn't standing there next to you?  What would you have preferred she refer to him as (i'm assuming she didn't know his name)

    Wait to you have that new baby. Anyone who calls them fat or skinny always seems like you as a parent are feeding them too little or too much. I too only learned this after having a child and have to utter un he is 50% all the time.  

  • image 266psyche:
    Awe, i'm sure she didn't mean to offend you.  Is he skinny?  It maybe her quickest way to describe him if he wasn't standing there next to you?  What would you have preferred she refer to him as (i'm assuming she didn't know his name)

    ditto lachute.  And she could've called him "that cute little blond boy" or just "little boy" would've sufficed.  It's not like I would've been like "huh?  what little boy are you talking about?"  obviously she meant mine.  when referring to someone else's kid it's always better to use adjectives like "sweet, pretty, cute, lovely" etc. even if it's not your deepest sentiment.  It's just polite and will win you more friends than anything else.

    agorabymiriam.etsy.com
  • image lachute:

    image 266psyche:
    Awe, i'm sure she didn't mean to offend you.  Is he skinny?  It maybe her quickest way to describe him if he wasn't standing there next to you?  What would you have preferred she refer to him as (i'm assuming she didn't know his name)

    Wait to you have that new baby. Anyone who calls them fat or skinny always seems like you as a parent are feeding them too little or too much. I too only learned this after having a child and have to utter un he is 50% all the time.  

    See, I never felt like this at all.  All those odd comments truly never bothered me, and I got a lot with Charlie - between his gigantor size, goopy eyes and receding hairline there was a lot to comment on.

    I got comments with Sam too.  People are just weird

    image
    DS 3.12.08
    DD 7.11.09
    DD 8.01.13
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