Sex & Romance
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To loud

So my SO & I live in a rather uptight apartment complex. Around us are a bunch of older couples that don't like the fact that we are living together out of wed lock so they tend to complain a lot over every single noise they hear. Well as I was taking laundry down one day the property manger stopped me and told me that we are going to get a write up for being loud. We have a noise policy that after 8pm we need too respect our neighbours and be quiet. That means all noise must stay within your own apartment. This would be easy if our walls were not paper thin.

So back to the whole write up part of this rant/question. I asked her straight out when this complaint was filed and she told me that she had just gotten it when she came in that morning. I asked her what the person said and she explained that they said we were fighting at midnight. My SO and I rarely fight and when we do it's never loud enough for people to hear it. I put my laundry in and went back up to my apartment. I explained to my SO that we were being written up for this "fight" that we don't remember having. While in the shower it dawned on me that we had sex the night before. I am not quiet while having sex and honestly I can't help it.

My SO wanted to go down and tell her that is what had happened and they must have mistaken us having sex for us fighting. I was completely against it cause of embarrassed. I don't want people knowing that I am loud in bed especially people whom don't know me. It's not like I can bury my face into a pillow I am an asthmatic and am lucky to not have a asthma attack after or during sex. Should I tell the manger that this is what happened or just let it go? and Do you have any tips and tricks to keep quiet?

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Re: To loud

  • it's not the fighting or the sex, it's the noise that's the problem.  Can you put your bed against a different wall? Or you could try a white noise generator. 
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  • image cmeinla:
    it's not the fighting or the sex, it's the noise that's the problem.  

    This.

    We live in the same situation.  You are going to have to learn to control the volume, plain and simple.  Dampening a noise's ability to penetrate through the wall is something you can try, but the volume is a must that needs to be reduced.  Be conscious of it, as a first step.

    Aside from moving your bed, you might also use wall coverings (tapestry, bookshelves).  I think the white noise machine is going to be a waste.  You need to think more along the lines of insulation rather than masking.   In fact, you might address the complex's need for more insulation?  Also, pick times of days when your neighbors might not be home, if possible - not a sure shot thing, of course, but we've managed.

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  • Be quick to tell them it was loud sex and not fighting. You don't need cops involved with somebody imaging violence. Plus the real facts will embarrass the jealous old birds into relative silence.
  • You will have to just quiet it down. Thats the downfall to apartment life, but put yourself in your neighbors shoes... I would be bothered if my neighbors were having loud sex or loud fights.

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  • Agreed.  You're just going to have to keep it down. 

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  • image C&J0525:

    Do you have any tips and tricks to keep quiet?

    Are you seriously asking for magic tips on how to make less noise? 

    Self. control.

    Also, too.

     

  • My tip would be to Quit faking it to make your man feel like he's doing it right. All studies show the louder you are the more your faking it. Good Luck
  • @Binzy2524 Well that would be useful if I was faking. Like my post said our ways are paper thin. We worked together to find something that worked for us and that's why I am so loud.
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  • image binzy2524:
    My tip would be to Quit faking it to make your man feel like he's doing it right. All studies show the louder you are the more your faking it. Good Luck

    This is bull.  Please provide references of "all studies." 

  • "All studies show binzy is a mega troll."

    That is all. 

    image

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  • My husband and I have a similar situation. We live in his parents' house and I've heard his parents having sex a number of times so I'm sure it works the other way around too. at first i buried my mouth/face into pillows or sheets or whatever but sometimes that isnt practical. now ive learned to breath hard and pant in place of yelling or moaning loudly. its hard to control at first but after a while u kinda train yourself. now even when we have the house to ourselves and i try to let myself be more "free", it doesnt come as naturally as before.
    h
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