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Random extreme pain issue

Hi all,

 I've been with my husband for a year and a half---we got married a few months ago. When I met him, I was a "virgin" though I'd been molested as a child. Sex is wonderful in that I love it, I enjoy it with him and trust him, though I felt very awkward at first. Its gotten more exciting, orgasms are better (took a long time for me to have one) however, I still get some times of extreme pain. 

He's not *ahem* very large so its not a size issue. And while there are angles that put pressure in more sensitive places, that isn't the issue either. Its like my whole pelvic floor muscles spaz out and the pain is intense. Sometimes I get numbness or tingling down my left leg at the same time or the feeling that my feet are on fire. It comes on usually about 20minutes after we have sex and lasts for a few hours. Though if I have sex the following day it will start during sex and we have to stop. We've tried different positions and slower more "touchy feely" sex can still cause it too. Once the symptoms came on when I started to get aroused just daydreaming about him... he wasn't home. :-(

He's very experienced, and said he's known women who had pain at times before, but I worry I'm not normal or that its psychological because of past trauma. I still get anxiety attacks over weird things or nothing at all. Anyone else experienced anything like this? I'd figured it was physical except for the time it came on when I became aroused.

I don't really feel like I need counseling--he and I can talk openly about things and though I get the panic attacks, I can think through it and go on about my day without anyone knowing other than someone like him who can tell. 


Re: Random extreme pain issue

  • I have never experienced that. It sounds painful. Once in a while I will have some pain but never in my legs or feet and it usually when my husband gets going and acts like a porn star. 

    Maybe you should go see a doctor and ask about this. Not to scare you.

  • I've had exactly the same problem and worried for a long time about what was wrong with me. After many visits to the doctor with no answers, I spent a lot of time analyzing what it was that could be causing this to happen. For me, I have always had pain when he enters and this caused me to have anxiety every time which would cause me to tense up all of my muscles. This cause sex to hurt during the whole act and pretty much be unenjoyable. After realizing really tried my hardest to relax and enjoy the moment and it helped a lot. Sometimes I still have some pain but it's much better. I think step #1 is to see your Dr though to rule out anything of concern. Good Luck.
  • I haven't had the exact same problem, but something somewhat similar.  Instead of sex, when I masturbate with my hands (this doesn't happen if I use a vibrator), I get extreme cramps.  They are almost like menstrual cramps, but feel much more intense and painful. I made several trips to the doctor to rule out anything serious, and she eventually told me to take calcium and magnesium pills.  She said that when I was masturbating I was seizing my muscles up and they were twisting around causing me the severe pain. Perhaps when you have intercourse your nerves are causing you to seize up your muscles?

    I've never had any sensations in my legs, though.

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