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if you could do one thing over about your IN move, what would it have been?

Looking back at it, I would have let my husband come over on his own, get everything set up, then just walk right into the situation without the hassle of picking an apartment, buying a bunch of crap, hooking everything up, etc.

Maybe on the way out, I'll just leave a month early and let him deal with it. 

Re: if you could do one thing over about your IN move, what would it have been?

  • I wouldn't have brought as much crap as I did.  When we packed we had no clue where we were going to be living since H was flying over here to search for a house and I was staying in the US to have the baby.  We packed so much stuff it's just being stored in the garage now.  

    I seriously think I'll just stay there after Christmas and let him deal with the house here.  Flying with a 1 1/2 year old is not going to be easy.  I'd rather not do it twice a couple months apart.   

  • If I could do one thing over.

    I would've tried to arrange some kind of housing situation in advance, so that we could get our residence permit, so that the customs office in Hamburg wouldn't have held our shipment at a rate of EUR100/day for somewhere between 2-4 weeks.

    But, actually, I guess a better way to explain it is: I would've gone with my H to the gov't office that he went to 3 days after we moved here, so that someone would've kept all of the papers the gov't office gave him because in that stack was his residence permit proof (they wouldn't accept what was in the passport, just the receipt from the government) and then we wouldn't have had to pay EUR100/day for storing our items in Hamburg, and our stuff could've been stored locally for EUR150 for a month.

  • I'd bring less stuff. I got rid of so much and now I know I could of gotten rid of more. Other than that I'd change nothing because it all brought me to where I am today :)
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  • Now that we are moving for about the 4th time in 2 years..

    1. I would not have registered for some much "crap"...i don't need or use a salad spinner and now it's sitting in a box, among other things. I would have preferred people to just give us money or no gift at all. (We moved less than a month after getting married)

    2.  Although having DH come over early and set up was really helpful - I would have told him to not ship ANY furniture over, and would not have bought as much as we did. We are going to end up selling most of it and it would just be easier if we had a furnished place. I'm learning the ease of being more mobile. :)


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  • image twopeasinapod:

    Looking back at it, I would have let my husband come over on his own, get everything set up, then just walk right into the situation without the hassle of picking an apartment, buying a bunch of crap, hooking everything up, etc.

    Maybe on the way out, I'll just leave a month early and let him deal with it. 

    I totally agree with you.  I wish I hadn't pushed so hard to go with H right away and be engaged before we moved.  In the end, the engagement made no difference in our relationship and the way we dealt with everything.

     It just meant I had a less nice ring. heh. 

  • I'd have stayed long enough to get my citizenship.
  • DH moved in February and I joined him in April but if we had to do it over again we would have waited until closer to the school year to come so I wouldn't have been sitting idle for so many months. 

    Our troubles with our move were pretty much all related to the bureaucracy of the Netherlands, however, and not our actual move so there isn't a lot we could've done about it.  

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  • I would not have brought as much stuff as we did. Who knew our second flat would be furnished plus all our stuff on top of it, at least we have lots of seating when guests come over!
  • LOL. I was thinking the same thing you said as I read the title of the post.

    I am leaving a month before DH, but he'll be spending that last month in a hotel, so not really avoiding anything other than living in a hotel....

    Proverbs 3:5-6
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    After 3 years living abroad, we are back in NOVA.
  • image jupiter2311:

    I would not have registered for some much "crap"...i don't need or use a salad spinner and now it's sitting in a box, among other things. I would have preferred people to just give us money or no gift at all. (We moved less than a month after getting married)

    yes. My dad's basement is basically filled with our wedding gifts that I (not DH, it definitely wasn't his fault) insisted we needed. And now I don't know what to do with any of it. I should have just taken cash since I knew we were moving.

    TTC #1 since Aug 2010 * BFP Aug 2011, EDD April 16 2012 * MMC @ 7w5d, D&C @ 10w5d
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  • image PittPurple:
    image jupiter2311:

    I would not have registered for some much "crap"...i don't need or use a salad spinner and now it's sitting in a box, among other things. I would have preferred people to just give us money or no gift at all. (We moved less than a month after getting married)

    yes. My dad's basement is basically filled with our wedding gifts that I (not DH, it definitely wasn't his fault) insisted we needed. And now I don't know what to do with any of it. I should have just taken cash since I knew we were moving.

     Yes! My mom's garage has a box full of stuff! She keeps asking when i want it...I keep telling her.. "not yet..." or never..:-s. It's stuff I thought I really wanted and thought I would use but wasn't really thinking of the whole shipping cost or moving inconvenience of it! Oh well, you live, you learn! :)


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  • I would've stored more stuff (electronics) and bought all our baby stuff in the US and shipped it with us.  I was pregnant a month after moving here, we knew we would TTC while we were here our first month.  And honestly I knew we would try before we left and thought about buying the big stuff but I thought 'what if we can't become pregnant right away and I have all that stuff around as a reminder'.  I should have done it anyways.  Everything here is almost twice the price back home.
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  • image hamilton.ja:
    I'd have stayed long enough to get my citizenship.

    Yep, same for me, we talk about this all the time!

    DS 02.10.2008 * DD 04.05.2011

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  • image andrea922:

    image hamilton.ja:
    I'd have stayed long enough to get my citizenship.

    Yep, same for me, we talk about this all the time!

     It just drives me nuts that if we ever need or want to go back I have to start all over and pay for the same damn visa again. Oh well. At least we know better now with DH getting his stuff sorted here. 

  • a) For sure, I would have brought less stuff.  Like a pp, we have stuff stored in our "maids' quarters," (more the size of a big closet, sadly) so now that we're discussing getting a helper, we have to put all of this stuff in storage!  We're living in a place for 3 years and we have a storage room.  Really sad.

    b) Would have used a different realtor.  I won't go into it, but she sucked.   Really sucked.

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  • Research more. I found a family and two weeks later I left the US to be an au pair in Switzerland! Let's just say the first family I lived with didn't work out.
  • I would have packed the rest of my books and sent them over. It costs so much, so I  decided to store them at my family's place, but I really miss my books!
  • Not signed the contract Tongue Tied

     Totally kidding! lol

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    Living in Haarlem, Netherlands

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  • Stayed in Asia or gone back to Canada. Unfortunately I regret making the decision the move here so soon after giving birth, I was messed up from post-preg hormones and wasn't thinking straight. 
  • I would have demanded more research and input into the "final destination".  When H said "how about xxx?" I didn't have any knowledge base to offer up alternative locations.
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