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Bridesmate Pregnant by Uncle

I got married last year and recently found out my step-sister who was also one of my bridesmates has been having an affair with her uncle by marriage.  We are semi-close, but I noticed a change in her behavior before the wedding.  I shrugged it off thinking she's just a single mom trying to make ends meet and was just tired or whatever (and I don't like to pry). But to make matters more uncomfortable she's now PG by him.  When I asked her who the father is she changed the subject real quick.  The whole family knows now as she and the uncle don't deny it and she's pretty far into her pregnancy.  I'm shocked and saddened, I thought I selected someone as a bridesmate as somebody I could count on as a woman and individual, but she turned out to be somebody I can't trust.  I'm not angry at her, I'm just in disbelief and don't know what to say to her now. 

Re: Bridesmate Pregnant by Uncle

  • Bridesmaid. Couldn't resist. 

  • image yoteamo2:
    I got married last year and recently found out my step-sister who was also one of my bridesmates has been having an affair with her uncle by marriage.  We are semi-close, but I noticed a change in her behavior before the wedding.  I shrugged it off thinking she's just a single mom trying to make ends meet and was just tired or whatever (and I don't like to pry). But to make matters more uncomfortable she's now PG by him.  When I asked her who the father is she changed the subject real quick.  The whole family knows now as she and the uncle don't deny it and she's pretty far into her pregnancy.  I'm shocked and saddened, I thought I selected someone as a bridesmate as somebody I could count on as a woman and individual, but she turned out to be somebody I can't trust.  I'm not angry at her, I'm just in disbelief and don't know what to say to her now. 

    WTF does this even mean? 

    fiizzlee = vag ** fiizzle = peen ** Babies shouldn't be born wit thangs ** **They're called first luddz fo' a reason -- mo' is supposed ta come after. Yo Ass don't git a medal fo' marryin yo' prom date. Unless yo ass is imoan. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. Then yo ass git a all-expenses paid cruise ta tha Mediterranean n' yo ass git ta hook up Jared Padalecki on tha flight over while bustin yo' jammies. But still no medal.
  • I think I explained myself pretty clearly. 
  • How is any of this your business?  Either you accept that your relationship with your bridesmaid has changed or you can try to build on your friendship while she's going through a difficult time.

     

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  • Why can't you trust her? Is her uncle your husband?
    fiizzlee = vag ** fiizzle = peen ** Babies shouldn't be born wit thangs ** **They're called first luddz fo' a reason -- mo' is supposed ta come after. Yo Ass don't git a medal fo' marryin yo' prom date. Unless yo ass is imoan. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. Then yo ass git a all-expenses paid cruise ta tha Mediterranean n' yo ass git ta hook up Jared Padalecki on tha flight over while bustin yo' jammies. But still no medal.
  • imoanimoan member
    10000 Comments Eighth Anniversary
    You're shytting me, right?!  Do you really think the term is "bridesmate"???
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  • image Sareclark:

    Bridesmaid. Couldn't resist. 

     ^^^^^

    this!

     

    what is it any of your business??? i dont think it was done to hurt you, so let them make their own choices. however, your wedding is over so their life shouldnt "affect" you as much 

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  • image yoteamo2:
    I think I explained myself pretty clearly. 

    So, she let you down?  Because she needed to not only stand up for you at your wedding, but lead a chaste life to fulfull your needs for perfect female role models in your life and marriage? 

    Way to make this awkward pregnancy all about you.  Plus, you get to be a snob about it.  Way to go.

    Clearly.

    My darling daughter just turned 4 years old.
  • image livinitup:

    image yoteamo2:
    I think I explained myself pretty clearly. 

    So, she let you down?  Because she needed to not only stand up for you at your wedding, but lead a chaste life to fulfull your needs for perfect female role models in your life and marriage? 

    Way to make this awkward pregnancy all about you.  Plus, you get to be a snob about it.  Way to go.

    Clearly.

    It's one thing to be upset that your step-sister had an affair with an uncle.

    It's another to tie it back to your wedding and how this has now ruined your world. 

    My Grandparents on their wedding day.
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    Repeat this to your self: My Wedding Party is made of my family and friends and I should treat them as such.
  • Did your stepsister meet the uncle at your wedding?  Do you feel somehow at fault for them having an affair?  Like the PP, I don't understand why you feel involved with this issue.  It was their choice to enter into a relationship, and now that she is pregnant, it has become public knowledge and I'm sure they are both embarrassed and feeling judged by the whole family.  If you are close to your stepsister or your uncle, I would talk to them about the situation and ask them how they would like the situation handled.  But it sounds like you are one of the people judging their actions, and not ready to support them. 

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  • You can disagree with the bridesmaid all you want but it is her decision.  Either choose to be her friend or don't but there is no reason to link it to your wedding if there is no real connection to them getting together from then.  As PP said, you could talk to them about the situation and ask them how they would like the situation handled or just stay out of it.  Whatever actions of hers that you don't agree with you don't have to live with so let it go.
  • What does her role in your wedding (which took place sometime last year) have anything to do with her situation or your life present day?
  • What they do is really none of your business.
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  • This is none of your beeswax, so mind your own.

     

  • MYOB.

    If you don't think you can trust her, tell her you do not want her to be your bridesmaid anymore and find a replacement. 

  • While this is an unusual situation, I'm not seeing how this has any bearing on your own life, or on your ability to trust this person. They're not doing anything to directly offend you or impose on you, so what's the problem? I think you need to get over this and MYOB.
  • Do you just love drama, or what?  Stay out of their business.
  • image zitiqueen:

    image yoteamo2:
    I got married last year and recently found out my step-sister who was also one of my bridesmates has been having an affair with her uncle by marriage.  We are semi-close, but I noticed a change in her behavior before the wedding.  I shrugged it off thinking she's just a single mom trying to make ends meet and was just tired or whatever (and I don't like to pry). But to make matters more uncomfortable she's now PG by him.  When I asked her who the father is she changed the subject real quick.  The whole family knows now as she and the uncle don't deny it and she's pretty far into her pregnancy.  I'm shocked and saddened, I thought I selected someone as a bridesmate as somebody I could count on as a woman and individual, but she turned out to be somebody I can't trust.  I'm not angry at her, I'm just in disbelief and don't know what to say to her now. 

    WTF does this even mean? 

    i'm also confused about that statement.  is there some sort of moral litmus test a person needs to pass in order to be in a wedding party?

  • Oh my! Its her life, why are you even concerned?
    Whitney Venessa
    image
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  • image katorigasuki:
    image zitiqueen:

    image yoteamo2:
    I got married last year and recently found out my step-sister who was also one of my bridesmates has been having an affair with her uncle by marriage.  We are semi-close, but I noticed a change in her behavior before the wedding.  I shrugged it off thinking she's just a single mom trying to make ends meet and was just tired or whatever (and I don't like to pry). But to make matters more uncomfortable she's now PG by him.  When I asked her who the father is she changed the subject real quick.  The whole family knows now as she and the uncle don't deny it and she's pretty far into her pregnancy.  I'm shocked and saddened, I thought I selected someone as a bridesmate as somebody I could count on as a woman and individual, but she turned out to be somebody I can't trust.  I'm not angry at her, I'm just in disbelief and don't know what to say to her now. 

    WTF does this even mean? 

    i'm also confused about that statement.  is there some sort of moral litmus test a person needs to pass in order to be in a wedding party?

    Apparently, she's already explained herself pretty clearly.

    My darling daughter just turned 4 years old.
  • I still don't get why it's any concern of yours. Unless Uncle bent the "bridesmate" over the gift table and got some spooge on a gift, let it go. If that's actually what happened, just be sure to get the gift receipt and exchange the contaminated gift.
    [IMG]http://i52.tinypic.com/mmbdis.jpg[/IMG]
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  • Either this is one fd up situation or MUD. Not sure which one LOL
    image
  • image blackfire5th:
    image livinitup:

    image yoteamo2:
    I think I explained myself pretty clearly. 

    So, she let you down?  Because she needed to not only stand up for you at your wedding, but lead a chaste life to fulfull your needs for perfect female role models in your life and marriage? 

    Way to make this awkward pregnancy all about you.  Plus, you get to be a snob about it.  Way to go.

    Clearly.

    It's one thing to be upset that your step-sister had an affair with an uncle.

    It's another to tie it back to your wedding and how this has now ruined your world. 

    She's pretty lucky to have you in her life.

    Gawd.

    promised myself I'd retire when I turned gold, and yet here I am
  • I think this is the funniest thing I've read on the nest ever.
  • Wait, so hang on.  Your step-sister was a single mom, but she had an affair with her uncle by marriage?  So I'm guessing this guy is her ex-husband's uncle?  She is in no way related to this person, and the uncle is not related to you?

    Mmmkay.

    1) This is so not your business.

    2) The fact that they were once related by marriage is certainly awkward, but if she is a "single mom" then they are not related in any way NOW, by marriage or otherwise.  So why is this such a tragedy?

    3) What does her being in your wedding party a year ago have to do with anything?

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  • image imoan:
    You're shytting me, right?!  Do you really think the term is "bridesmate"???

    LOL!!!  OMG, I'm dying!  I think I may have even peed a little!

  • LMAO ... :) She was busy thinking about other things
  • They aren't related in any way. They fell in love as people do. Now they are having a baby. It seems that you and the family should offer her congratulations on the upcoming arrival

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