I posted on here a month or so ago about H's neice and nephew being allowed to say whatever they felt, and also about neice wanting to sleep with us. Just mainly wanted to say thanks for the advice and give a brief update...
Last night, H came home from a visit with his family and he was telling me that his mom told him she and his sister were talking about how his SIL and B raised their children, and they think SIL is a bad mother. It didn't sit well with me, even though I love my MIL and SIL (really H's whole family). MIL had the luxury of being a stay-at-home mom, and his sister has no children. H knows that SIL and B are good parents and I think he kind of defended them a little to his mom. SIL works full time, takes care of her kids, loves them, does things with them, gives them structure, and she still finds time to keep an immaculate house. Although I don't agree with the way they do a thing or two, they are very good parents and SIL is a wonderful person and a good mother. I pretty much told H that I don't want to get in the middle of the family drama, but I kindly pointed out to H that MIL and SIL have never walked a mile in SIL's shoes and they had no idea what it was like.
I used that conversation as an opening to discuss the smart mouth/manners issue, and H really understood what I was saying. I encouraged him to talk to them when they say things like that and try to correct it. They adore him, so they'll listen to him. If I say something, they might feel "picked on" because they truly do not know any different. He really listened and said he would take notice and talk to them the next time. Of course, I pointed out that they are good kids, and my kids have faults too, and no kid is perfect.
Then H brought up keeping them for a few days so they can go to VBS with us and I said that I could put my boys in the same room for a few days and neice and nephew could sleep in my son's room. I just kinda put it like, DN is WAAAAY too old to be sleeping with us or with my boys. Since they are brother and sister and he's pretty young, I thought it would be okay for them to share a room. H said that would be fine. He also told me they were all 3 play wrestling and he noticed DN was starting to get boobs, so he quit playing that and started playing something else with them. I just replied that no one wants to see them grow up, but we have to accept it. I think he gets it.
Anyway, didn't mean to write a book. I just wanted to give a quick update and say thanks again for the advice. :-)