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Don't want to hurt friend's feelings

One of my good friends that I've had for many years changed her career path three years ago and became a hairstylist.  In support of her new career, I've been going to her exclusively for the last two years.  The place she works at is about a 45 minute drive from my home (w/o traffic). 

I love the way she cuts my hair, but I haven't been thrilled with the way she highlights my hair.  There have been at least three times that she fixed it and I even dyed my hair back to my natural color to color over the last highlights.

I went to another salon recently to have my hair washed/dried because my arm was in a cast.  I really like the stylist and we talked about color.  I want to try working with her on finding the right color for my hair.

How do I tell my friend that I want to try someone new without hurting my friend's feelings?  I'm NOT about brutal honesty, but I also want to confront the situation  directly with her.  I don't want her to see pics of my new hair color on FB and then wonder why I didn't go to her.  I would like to be "gently" honest....but I'm at a loss for words! 

What do you think about this situation?  What would you suggest I say/do?

Re: Don't want to hurt friend's feelings

  • i might just lie and say that i have another friend that does colouring and then pick one of the following:

    - either that she is giving me a huuuuge discount

    - or that i want to give her my business for a while (like you did for this's only fair!)

  • I wouldn't say anything and see if it comes up.  If it does, consider these options:

    1) "I went to a stylist closer to home."

    2) "As good as you are, I really like the new things this person is trying with my hair."

    3) (if you want to do honesty) "I appreciate the time you've taken to do my hair, but I haven't been satisfied with the last few times you did my highlights."

  • I have two different stylists - one for color (who gives terrible cuts), one for cuts (who is ok with color, but charges too much).  Would you consider going to your friend just for cuts, and not for color?

    A true friend will understand that 45 minutes out of the way is too much.  I would tell her you can't manage 90 minutes into your schedule anymore, as much as you love how much she cuts your hair.

  • Lie baby, lie.

    There is no way you can tell your friend that you aren't happy with how she has done your hair without it hurting her feelings. Tell her the drive is too much.

    Also, don't just wait to see if she notices.  She'll notice and the fact you didn't say anything will hurt her feelings too.

  • This has all been great advice! 

    I think the approach I will take is a combo of everyone's advice.  I will tell her before or right after I have my hair colored and let her know that I got a gift card to this new salon and decided to do something "big" and color my hair.  I'll let her know that I LOVE the way she cuts my hair and I will be sure to continue going to her for that.

    Thanks everyone!

  • I've lied in the past and said that my friend's sister needed a "model head" to practice doing highlights on. Yea! Free like a charm. 

    image image image
  • Different stylists have different styles of coloring. You could mention that you are going to try this woman because you saw some of her work. Making sure she still knows you love the cuts.
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