September 2008 Weddings
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Is my thinking out of whack?

So after Amanda's post re: the frozen dinners, this conversation happened at my WW Meeting last night.

Leader:What do you have in your kitchen that isn't helping your weightloss goals

Lady: Oh! All the junk food!

Leader: Why do you keep junk food in the house?

Lady: Because I have kids! (said with a "DUH" attitude, like it's expected that kids must have junk food).

Leader: And why would you feed your kids junk food?

The lady had no response to that. I don't get it. Why would you focus so much on getting healthy, but then feed your kids that stuff? When I was a kid, we NEVER had junk in the house, ever. After Halloween my mom would take all my candy (not that it was much, I only ever got to trick or treat at like 5 houses) and she'd dole it out one piece a day til it was gone. I still have a weight problem, but hello, it's not because I don't know WHAT to eat, it's because I eat too much - my mom taught me to also love healthy food.

I just don't understand. Is it cultural that we think we should/can only feed our kids chicken nuggets and mac'n'cheese? Ken works with many Indian folks and they feed their kids the same stuff they eat! One couple we had dinner with and she made this amazing spicy, crazy food that made MY eyes water and their 18-month old was eating it like it ain't no thang. I don't get it!

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Re: Is my thinking out of whack?

  • image NineTwentyOhEight:
    Is it cultural that we think we should/can only feed our kids chicken nuggets and mac'n'cheese?

    I love chicken nuggets and mac & cheese. Embarrassed We do have that for lunch or dinner sometimes. We're also picky eaters.

    But I totally get, and agree, with the point you are making.


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  • We always ate what my parents did.  My parents were very strict with our meals; a meat, starch, two veggies from different color groups. Maybe bread.  Sure, we had mac and cheese occasionally, but it was typically homemade so my mom could control the ingredients and it was a small side dish, not a main course.

    We got frozen dinners MAYBE once a year if Dad was out of town.  I remember not caring for them much.  When we got older, we did have some more snacky stuff.

    My mom also forbid us to have soda (we were allowed a little on weekends when we became teens, although I never liked it), made us drink milk with dinner until HS, and watered down other sugary drinks.  As a result, I can't stand full-strength sugared beverages.  I drink maybe one soda a year (always ginger ale), and if I have sweetened tea from the store I water it down with homemade unsweetened tea or water.  

    My mom stopped buying Easter candy because she ended up throwing most of it out.  Same goes for halloween candy; at least half of it got thrown out.

    I really do believe that the habits we are raised with follow us into adulthood.

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  • image MrsC968:

    image NineTwentyOhEight:
    Is it cultural that we think we should/can only feed our kids chicken nuggets and mac'n'cheese?

    I love chicken nuggets and mac & cheese. Embarrassed We do have that for lunch or dinner sometimes. We're also picky eaters.

    But I totally get, and agree, with the point you are making.


    I just picked those because I think of them as "kid" food - no offense, we eat those things sometimes too!! But, I just feel like it's this weird cultural thing that we cater to kids in this way - when I was a kid, I ate what the adults were eating, or I didn't eat. That was that. I don't get these people that keep a whole extra set of food in the house for their kids.
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  • Oh, and as far as not liking what my parents served - didn't matter.  I clearly remember sitting at the table for extended periods of time until I finished.

    My uncle had a "freebie" system with his kids.  They were each allowed 1 veggie that they didn't have to eat.  The rest, too bad, you're eating it.

    I do have a problem with my parents' "clean your plate" philosophy.  Sometimes I just really wasn't hungry.

     

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  • image NineTwentyOhEight:
    image MrsC968:

    image NineTwentyOhEight:
    Is it cultural that we think we should/can only feed our kids chicken nuggets and mac'n'cheese?

    I love chicken nuggets and mac & cheese. Embarrassed We do have that for lunch or dinner sometimes. We're also picky eaters.

    But I totally get, and agree, with the point you are making.


    I just picked those because I think of them as "kid" food - no offense, we eat those things sometimes too!! But, I just feel like it's this weird cultural thing that we cater to kids in this way - when I was a kid, I ate what the adults were eating, or I didn't eat. That was that. I don't get these people that keep a whole extra set of food in the house for their kids.

    I didn't really realize people actually do this until you mentioned it.  Now that I think about it, I know you're right.  

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  • image reps14:

     

    I didn't really realize people actually do this until you mentioned it.  Now that I think about it, I know you're right.  

    The thing is, if you KNOW it's not healthy because YOU shouldn't be eating it, why buy it and keep it in the house for your kids??? They're just setting their kids up to have bad eating habits. I guess sometimes it's hard to get kids to eat - I was picky as a little kid. But when they get hungry, they'll eat. Maybe parents are just too busy/stressed/etc to fight and so they give kids whatever they want so that they'll eat? or they show their love through food? I don't get it. I hope I can set a better example for my kids when the time comes...

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  • So like I said, I was a picky eater. While for the most part my brother and I ate whatever the meal was, there were times when we didn't want to eat/finish what was there and would ask for a bowl of cereal or something. 

    We were never truely forced to eat what was there. There are also a lot of things I don't like, such as steak or pork chops, and I'm glad my parents didn't force me to eat it when I was younger. When my mom did make steak or pork she would make me something different.

    I definitely agree that separate meals in general for kids is not a good idea. But for cases of allergies and simply not likely something I think it is okay (and I'm sure you guys agree and that isn't what this post is about).

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  • image NineTwentyOhEight:

    The thing is, if you KNOW it's not healthy because YOU shouldn't be eating it, why buy it and keep it in the house for your kids??? They're just setting their kids up to have bad eating habits. I guess sometimes it's hard to get kids to eat - I was picky as a little kid. But when they get hungry, they'll eat. Maybe parents are just too busy/stressed/etc to fight and so they give kids whatever they want so that they'll eat? or they show their love through food? I don't get it. I hope I can set a better example for my kids when the time comes...

    At this point we are being very careful.  He eats better than we do!  I hope I can resist the temptation when it gets frustrating when he gets to that picky stage.

    For now, veggies are his absolute favorite, even though we introduced fruits at the same time.  He must take after me - doesn't have a taste for the sweet stuff.  When he was sick and dehydrated, the doctor suggested giving water or really dilute juice in addition to milk to make sure he got enough fluids, and he would drink plain water over water with a little juice or pedialyte.  Who knows, maybe it really is because I ate a ton of veggies and cut back on sweets when pregnant? In any case, we'd like to keep this preference going!

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  • I always had to eat what was on my place.  Believe me there were many nights I was alone at the table long after because I was trying to hide the food I didn't want to eat.  Embarrassed  We almost always had a meat, veggie and potatoes.  My dad had a garden so potatoes was something we had tons of every year.  Veggies were too, but I am not a big vegatable person except the basics (corn, peas, beans).  A lot of our food came from the garden, which ironically I never really thought about until later years that I never had canned and store bought that much growing up.

    We did however have fruit snacks, cookies, etc. around.  And I did drink a lot of soda when I was younger.  But, my dad did too so it was always there.  I don't have nearly as much as I used to.  And I am sure I will still provide some sweet snacks to my children, but even my parents are more aware of it these days. 

    Funny thing is they still keep coke in the house (cans) because my grandfather drinks it and I have it when I am there.  I have it because I never drink it anymore and it is kind of a treat for me while I am there.  A couple of months ago my mom made a comment to me about having water instead and I laughed at her.  It was funny because in her mind that is what I drink because she doesn't see me day to day.  I had to explain to her that I only have it at her house.  haha

  • image MrsC968:

    So like I said, I was a picky eater. While for the most part my brother and I ate whatever the meal was, there were times when we didn't want to eat/finish what was there and would ask for a bowl of cereal or something. 

    We were never truely forced to eat what was there. There are also a lot of things I don't like, such as steak or pork chops, and I'm glad my parents didn't force me to eat it when I was younger. When my mom did make steak or pork she would make me something different.

    I definitely agree that separate meals in general for kids is not a good idea. But for cases of allergies and simply not likely something I think it is okay (and I'm sure you guys agree and that isn't what this post is about).

    Obviously for allergies, no question!  On occasion for not liking something is ok in my opinion (especially when the kids are older), but not every single meal, and not when it is replaced by junk.

    I was forced to eat the steak and pork chops (I didn't care for them much, either), but I was permitted to have smaller portions in exchange for more veggies.  Or adding a salad.

    The milk thing also really bothered me.  Once my mom figured out that I really was somewhat lactose intolerant, I was allowed to have water or iced tea (when I got to HS age). I cannot drink milk to this day!

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  • image lizlarry:

    I always had to eat what was on my place.  Believe me there were many nights I was alone at the table long after because I was trying to hide the food I didn't want to eat.  Embarrassed  We almost always had a meat, veggie and potatoes.  My dad had a garden so potatoes was something we had tons of every year.  Veggies were too, but I am not a big vegatable person except the basics (corn, peas, beans).  A lot of our food came from the garden, which ironically I never really thought about until later years that I never had canned and store bought that much growing up.

    We did however have fruit snacks, cookies, etc. around.  And I did drink a lot of soda when I was younger.  But, my dad did too so it was always there.  I don't have nearly as much as I used to.  And I am sure I will still provide some sweet snacks to my children, but even my parents are more aware of it these days. 

    Funny thing is they still keep coke in the house (cans) because my grandfather drinks it and I have it when I am there.  I have it because I never drink it anymore and it is kind of a treat for me while I am there.  A couple of months ago my mom made a comment to me about having water instead and I laughed at her.  It was funny because in her mind that is what I drink because she doesn't see me day to day.  I had to explain to her that I only have it at her house.  haha

    I feel like we grew up in the same house!  I clearly remember one night when I outlasted my mom.  She got tired sitting at the table with me and let me get down after probably 2 hours! That was the only time, though.

    I really wished my dog had liked lima beans...

    The soda thing is the same for Brendan.  He only drinks coke when he's at my IL's house.  They still ask me every single time if I want one, even though I tell them I never drink it. It's like they don't believe me that someone doesn't drink soda.

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  • image reps14:

    The milk thing also really bothered me.  Once my mom figured out that I really was somewhat lactose intolerant, I was allowed to have water or iced tea (when I got to HS age).

    That stinks! 

    We also had to drink milk too, but I love it and still drink milk with almost all my meals at home.

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  • I just wish we had a dog!  I used to think I was so smart when I was young and if I hid it on the far side of my plant where I couldn't see it I was ok.  Well, that is the side that faced my mother...didn't work so well.  I also used to sit near a plant, I would go back later to throw stuff out.  I was a REALLY picky eater when I was little, especially with meats. 

  • image lizlarry:

    I just wish we had a dog!  I used to think I was so smart when I was young and if I hid it on the far side of my plant where I couldn't see it I was ok.  Well, that is the side that faced my mother...didn't work so well.  I also used to sit near a plant, I would go back later to throw stuff out.  I was a REALLY picky eater when I was little, especially with meats. 

    Ha! Love it!

    I also perfected the "spit it into the napkin without anyone noticing" technique. Or the "accidentally knock the food into the napkin" technique.

    Actually, I'm pretty sure my mom knew about that; I tried not to do it too much as to not get caught!

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  • image reps14:
    image lizlarry:

    I just wish we had a dog!  I used to think I was so smart when I was young and if I hid it on the far side of my plant where I couldn't see it I was ok.  Well, that is the side that faced my mother...didn't work so well.  I also used to sit near a plant, I would go back later to throw stuff out.  I was a REALLY picky eater when I was little, especially with meats. 

    Ha! Love it!

    I also perfected the "spit it into the napkin without anyone noticing" technique. Or the "accidentally knock the food into the napkin" technique.

    Actually, I'm pretty sure my mom knew about that; I tried not to do it too much as to not get caught!

    Yes This is so me.  Anything to hide it.

  • I have a horrible soda problem, and I kind of think it was because it was my mom's "diet snack" when I was a kid...oddly enough, while we didn't eat vegetables as often as we should, we didn't have a lot of junk food persay growing up. Cookies or ice cream a couple of times a week but not endless chips and twinkies and such. And I drank a TON of milk.  I think my occassional snack of cookies was a lot less detremental than the only veggies we ever had - and agreed to eat, which I think is why we never had others - were corn and peas. To this day I have trouble eating salad.

  • I fully agree that it's ridiculous so many parents do this, or they use their kids food preferences as their excuse to eat crappy food like super-processed chicken nuggets and macaroni and cheese or McDonalds and other fast foods.

    Both DH and I came out of high school overweight.  We both love food, but it's not for lack of our parents trying, or should I say their knowledge.  Both my mom and MIL during Thanksgiving weekend were talking about "Oh if I knew when the kids were growing up what I know now....I would have made them eat this and that instead of rich sauced up meals..."

    ILs never had soda or sugary drinks around their house and neither DH, nor his sisters drink soda on a regular basis.  That is one thing I think we'll definitely do with our kids. 

    What neither of our families taught us....was portion control, and that is something I will probably fight forever, same as DH.

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  • Coming in late here. But I agree with what most PP have said. I hate to judge how how other people parent their children, but I can't get over how my nephews eat. I guess they aren't so bad compared to some, but there are alot of "alternate" meals at their house. My theory is, they'll if they're hungry. It kills me when I see them eating boxed mac and cheese at holidays instead of this wonderful meal. They are getting better as they get older.

    I absolutely admire my best friend. Her 4 yr old daughter eats what they eat. And if she chooses not too, then she waits until the next meal. She ate pork chops at my house.

    I remember some friends growing up who had " Saturday cereal." They had to eat healthier cereal during the week, but on Saturdays, they got sugary cereal. I think that is a good compromise to teach kids moderation.

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