Military Nesties
Dear Community,

Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.

If you have questions about this, please email [email protected]

Thank you.

Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.

I need opinions...hard for me to post so please don't flame

Ok....so my DH gets 100% VA disability and was told by the VA if he does work it will mess up his claim. As most of you know I am deployed right now. I have encouraged DH to find something to do to take up some of the spare time. Well he found something I am not really fond of. He joined an organization of .....knights....yeah that's what I said! They make armor and helmets and swords and fight like they are knights.They call the "head people" Sir even. And as any good wife I try to be supportive of anything he does but this is just over the top for me. I am trying to be excited for him when he sends me pictures of his helmet and stuff. It is just hard for me to except. I feel that I have been mean over the issue but I Really try not to be I just can't get excited and feel embarassed about it. I have wanted to ask you ladies for a while I am just don't know what to do. It's like the "club" of losers you see in movies. If any of you have seen Role Models it is like the club in that but maybe not so bad. WWYD?? I try to be supportive it's just hard for me to think that is "normal"

Re: I need opinions...hard for me to post so please don't flame

  • Seriously, this cracked me up.

    Just be happy he found something he loves.

  • He could be doing much worse thing with his time. I.e. when you first said "knights" I was afraid you meant some sort of racist clan. I agree with PP, just be happy he found something he enjoys. You don't have to get involved in his new hobby but I would advise you not to be too judgmental or make comments to put him down because you think it's weird. Just let him explore his new interest and see how it develops.
  • One of my good friends out here is in "one of those".  I laughed at first, made several Medieval Times reference jokes and let it go!  Whatever makes him happy.
  • yeah I would probably think my hubby was nerdy for doing it to, but its harmless right? its not hindering your marriage is it? is he happy doing it?

    Just let him get into it, it may turn out that he doesn't like it that much or its just too over the top. 

    My husband desperately wants to be a "Free Mason" :::eye roll:::

  • image MellsBells:

    Seriously, this cracked me up.

    Just be happy he found something he loves.

    Ummmm thanks for the advice! jk lol That's what I am trying to do it is just hard! He really is happy and having a ton of fun with it, just why not something a little more normal!?!?
  • I giggled a little bit at the image of Role Models.

    Be supportive.  It's awesome that he found something he likes and a group of people who share that interest.  You don't have to like it and dress up too, but definitely encourage him to keep doing what he likes.  As with any hobby, I think it's worth discussing how it will effect your budget or your time together when you get home, but other than that, party on, Garth.

    Twin boys due 7/25/12
  • Thanks ladies, you have great advice. It is harmless and he could be doing worse and it is not hindering our marriage at all.

     I am glad he is not sitting at home being alone and depressed because I am gone! Gotta think on the bright side I guess!

  • A lot of people get addicted to WoW, and that's pretty nerdy too, but I think the advantage to what your H is doing is that it gets him out of the house and he gets human interaction.  (Unlike our relationships on the nest, LOL.)
    Twin boys due 7/25/12
  • image MrsOjoButtons:

    I giggled a little bit at the image of Role Models.

    Be supportive.  It's awesome that he found something he likes and a group of people who share that interest.  You don't have to like it and dress up too, but definitely encourage him to keep doing what he likes.  As with any hobby, I think it's worth discussing how it will effect your budget or your time together when you get home, but other than that, party on, Garth.

    We did discuss how much it would cost, the initial cost was $20 to join ( IMO you shouldn't have to pay but whats 20 bucks) and then the initial cost of making the "armor" which wasn't too bad then the only other cost will be gas for the trips to the get togethers. So it really is pretty harmless. It does sometimes take away from the times we are able to talk but if it was a "normal" situation he would be working during those times. 
  • Awe, I think that is sweet!  I am just glad that my husband is not a Knight...I would not tell anyone that he was! hahah! 

    It obviously makes him happy and he gets excited about doing it (sending you pictures of his awesome helmet and armor!!)  She just try and be excited with him.  MH does it for me with my photography...he could really care less!

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  •  I can understand how you feel but I would just embrace his dorky side.  It is keeping him off the couch and out of trouble!
  • The whole I was reading that I was thinking, you mean like in the movie Role Models?

    Maybe it's geek part of me, but that actually kinda sounds fun. Getting in to the open air with strangers and just having fun doing something harmless.

    I'd give it YesYes

    I'd just tell him it's nice that he found something fun, just don't expect you to want to do it also, right?

    PhotobucketMilitary Newlyweds FAQ Button
  • Oh wow, the Role Models reference made me laugh.

    I'm not going to lie, I would have a really tough time with this. But like everyone said, at least he's out doing something and as long as it's not affecting your marriage or your time together (when you get home) then it's a good thing.

    [IMG]http://i39.tinypic.com/2q9wcp0.jpg[/IMG]
    <a href="http://www.thebump.com/?utm_source=ticker&utm_medium=HTML&utm_campaign=tickers" title="Baby Names"><img src="http://global.thebump.com/tickers/tt138e9b.aspx" alt=" Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker" border="0" /></a>
  • It is weird but you sound like you're in MH's position when I go on about books, and how excited I am about the points I'm earned on my book challenge.  It's weird and dorky but if he starts acting like that one family on wifeswap (where their whole lifestyle was centered on meidevil times), then I would worry.
  • image danamh83:
    It is weird but you sound like you're in MH's position when I go on about books, and how excited I am about the points I'm earned on my book challenge.  It's weird and dorky but if he starts acting like that one family on wifeswap (where their whole lifestyle was centered on meidevil times), then I would worry.
    LOL I sure hope not!!
  • image danamh83:
    It is weird but you sound like you're in MH's position when I go on about books, and how excited I am about the points I'm earned on my book challenge.  It's weird and dorky but if he starts acting like that one family on wifeswap (where their whole lifestyle was centered on meidevil times), then I would worry.

    haha I've seen that! Those people were nuts (as they usually are on wifeswap)!

    [IMG]http://i39.tinypic.com/2q9wcp0.jpg[/IMG]
    <a href="http://www.thebump.com/?utm_source=ticker&utm_medium=HTML&utm_campaign=tickers" title="Baby Names"><img src="http://global.thebump.com/tickers/tt138e9b.aspx" alt=" Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker" border="0" /></a>
  • Ok, question? If getting a job would hurt his VA disabilities, won't fighting with swords be worse?  That is a very physical activity.  Making the armour and helmets is also very physical.  That would be my concern.
    [IMG]http://i42.tinypic.com/160yf86.jpg[/IMG]

    <a href="https://sites.google.com/site/milnestfaq/" target="_blank" title="Military Newlyweds FAQ"><img src="http://tinyurl.com/ya7ofn4" alt="Military Newlyweds FAQ Button" height=86 width=108></a>
  • image iluvmytxrgr:
    Ok, question? If getting a job would hurt his VA disabilities, won't fighting with swords be worse?  That is a very physical activity.  Making the armour and helmets is also very physical.  That would be my concern.

    ditto this. If he's able to sword fight (and I'm having a hard time typing this without laughing ;) there must be some work he's able to do. My guess is he's rather young to not work for the rest of his life.

  • image *Krista*:

    image iluvmytxrgr:
    Ok, question? If getting a job would hurt his VA disabilities, won't fighting with swords be worse?  That is a very physical activity.  Making the armour and helmets is also very physical.  That would be my concern.

    ditto this. If he's able to sword fight (and I'm having a hard time typing this without laughing ;) there must be some work he's able to do. My guess is he's rather young to not work for the rest of his life.

    I asked about his disability in another thread, and I think the biggest issue prohibiting him from working is severe headaches.  It doesn't sound like he can keep a regular work schedule because he can't anticipate them. 

    Twin boys due 7/25/12
  • image MrsOjoButtons:
    image *Krista*:

    image iluvmytxrgr:
    Ok, question? If getting a job would hurt his VA disabilities, won't fighting with swords be worse?  That is a very physical activity.  Making the armour and helmets is also very physical.  That would be my concern.

    ditto this. If he's able to sword fight (and I'm having a hard time typing this without laughing ;) there must be some work he's able to do. My guess is he's rather young to not work for the rest of his life.

    I asked about his disability in another thread, and I think the biggest issue prohibiting him from working is severe headaches.  It doesn't sound like he can keep a regular work schedule because he can't anticipate them. 

    Thanks for the info. That makes sense. The amount of fraud I see in the disability system tends to make me a little too suspicious.

  • I agree with many of the previous posters...there are many things that he could be doing to fill his time that are much worse.  Be as supportive as you can and keep this mantra in your head..."I love this man, I love this man!"

    [IMG]http://i45.tinypic.com/33ys41y.jpg[/IMG]


    <a href="http://www.thebump.com/?utm_source=ticker&utm_medium=HTML&utm_campaign=tickers" title="Baby Names"><img src="http://global.thebump.com/tickers/tt13bfce.aspx" alt=" Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker" border="0" /></a>
  • Oh its not that bad. I think its cute that he found something to do that he enjoys. And he is obviously not embarrased by it so you shouldnt be either. He isn't making you do it, just trying to have some fun!

    [IMG]http://i145.photobucket.com/albums/r210/headae85/this-rabbit-takes-no-shit1.jpg[/IMG]
  • image MrsOjoButtons:
    image *Krista*:

    image iluvmytxrgr:
    Ok, question? If getting a job would hurt his VA disabilities, won't fighting with swords be worse?  That is a very physical activity.  Making the armour and helmets is also very physical.  That would be my concern.

    ditto this. If he's able to sword fight (and I'm having a hard time typing this without laughing ;) there must be some work he's able to do. My guess is he's rather young to not work for the rest of his life.

    I asked about his disability in another thread, and I think the biggest issue prohibiting him from working is severe headaches.  It doesn't sound like he can keep a regular work schedule because he can't anticipate them. 

    Thanks for clearing that up, Ojo.  I just figured if it were his back or something physical like that then it wouldn't make sense to him to have such a physical hobby.  I don't think it's a bad hobby.  There are far worse things for him to do with his time.  I would probably chuckle if H told me he were doing it, but I would support his effort. 

    [IMG]http://i42.tinypic.com/160yf86.jpg[/IMG]

    <a href="https://sites.google.com/site/milnestfaq/" target="_blank" title="Military Newlyweds FAQ"><img src="http://tinyurl.com/ya7ofn4" alt="Military Newlyweds FAQ Button" height=86 width=108></a>
  • I'm a  little late, but I HAVE to tell you about my BIL and his wife. They are into anime and video games. So much so that they spend thousands of dollars (that they don't have) each year to go to conventions in Orlando and Miami and Texas that they make elaborate costumes for. And take off work for. They are even in an anime club! She's the president! It's so overboard and it's hard to take it light heartedly when you know they are blowing what tiny bit of money they have on fabric and a wig. But it's their decision. I keep my comments to myself. For the most part!

    Basically what I'm saying is it could be much much worse.

    http://www.myspace.com/fantasyreverie This is her myspace. There's plenty of public photos.

  • Seeing as though my cousin actually forges swords and makes chain mail (and make good money off of it), then I don't see anything wrong with it. It gives him something to do and it makes him happy..... yeah it's not in the realm of "regular" or mainstream but who cares...

    image image
Sign In or Register to comment.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards