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To find out or not to find out...

the gender of teh baby? I am so torn. I've been adamant that I do not want to find out the sex of this baby, but now that my big u/s is approaching (June 4th), I am starting to reconsider.

For one, I don't want to know because I already had the thrill of knowing with Alex, and I want to experience the other side, hearing "it's a ..." in the delivery room.

Also, our families really want to find out the gender, and have been on our case, and I don't want to give them the satisfaction.

For those that have two kids (or second on the way), did you or will you find out the gender?

Re: To find out or not to find out...

  • Find out! What if its a girl? You won't be prepared.

    Was that convincing enough?

    Why is your family bothering you about it? Your sister never told what all her kids were?

  • DH and I have discussed this a lot.  When we have another one, we will be finding out the sex, but we will be keeping it a secret from family.  The only reason we want t find out is of course we are all prepared for a little boy and if we have a girl then we will have to get different things.

    I still found it thrilling in the delivery room when they said "its a beautiful boy" I still cried. 

    Do you think either just you or just DH would find out and not tell the other. 

    GL and keep us posted on your decision.

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  • We didn't find out with this one but should we be lucky enough to have another we will be finding out. Like you said we want to know what it is like to know before hand as well.

    Do you like to be prepared ahead of time? If so I'd probably find out. You already have lots of boy stuff to pass along if you have another boy right? If you don't find out then you will probably need to buy a bunch of gender neutral stuff if this baby is a girl. Would you want to do that? Does it matter to you?

    My personal opinion is that you family doesn't have a say, lol. Do what you guys want to do. Either way it will be fun and surprising if you find out ahead of time or not.

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  • I don't have kids but as a very very very hands on auntie (read: nosey) I get so agitated when I dont know the sex. Ha ha. The worst is when the parents know and won't spill the beans! lol If you aren't worried about needing gender specific stuff for the new baby, then I'd leave it a surprise.
  • I vote for finding out, I can't take the suspense and surpises kill me.  I will confess when I was a about 14 or so there was a present under the Christmas and I didn't know what it was so I got my 3 year old sister to open and then told my mom that she just ripped it open, that is how bad I am.

    Also, I like being able to call the baby by their name, and not it or baby!

    In the end the decision is up to you though!

    Proud Mama to two sweet kiddos.
  • We found out the sex for both.  Originally we had considered leaving it as a surprise this time, but then when we started thinking about it possibly being a girl and having absolutely nothing for girls we reconsidered.  I'm so glad we did b/c now we've had the last couple of months to buy things for her specifically instead of trying to re-use all of Julian's boy things (bedding,  bibs, blankets, etc).
  • I myself am torn for the first one. But when it?s time for a second I personally want to know just in case it is the opposite sex I can prepare for him/her.  In my family we don?t get 2nd showers [well we do but it?s the baby?s bedding ? that?s it] so I?d want to get ?prepared?.

     

    Then again I might change my mind ? sorry I?m not much help! lol

     

    But I can say that if and when I find out it?s because me-myself-&-I want to know.

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  • we've held out knowing for both, and we like it that way. Its all personal choice.

    I personally don't think that babies need a lot in the first few days... and all of our newborn stuff is not gender specific, so we can use it for baby #2 no matter if its a boy or girl. it usually doesn't take long for my family to start sending gifts of clothes when baby arrives... so I'm not worried about not being "prepared".

  • Aghr, this is so hard. I am a super obsessive planner and it's killing me that I can't plan properly (ie: if  it's a girl, I'd want super girly furniture, but if we don't find out i'll have to get something neutral). We found out with Alex cause neither of us could've waited 9 months, plus I wanted to decorate very gender specific.

    This time, I dont' care about the decoration as much (ie: I could live with neutral furniture, even though it's not my first choice).

    DH really wants to know, but I kind of want the surprise.

    Aghr, what to do, what to do.

    I do have some neutral sleepers that I could make do with at the beginning and could buy girly stuff it the baby happens to be a girl (which btw is what the chinese gender chart predicts!).

  • We don't have kids yet, but when we do, we already have discussed that we will want to know.  We both have said that we want to decorate gender specific, and like a PP said, I want to start calling the baby by their name, not just "it".
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  • Keep it a secret! That's your first thought, I'd go with it.
    Cara, married 05.14.05 Leyla Marie, born 01.11.07 Lilypie Pregnancy tickers
  • We didn't find out and I loved not knowing - especially b/c people were telling me they "truly knew" I was having a boy, and I was totally surprised when the doctor said "it's a girl!"

    We probably won't find out with #2

  • I always said I would find out the sex of any babies I had.  I "knew" since I was a teenager that I wanted to know.  But now I'm so excited that we aren't finding out because I think it's so much more exciting that way, plus it's making us so much more creative with the nursery decorations.

    I vote not finding out.  I was mad at first that I wasn't going to find out (DH didn't want to know, and I thought it was stupid if I knew and he didn't) but now I love the idea of someone saying "It's a boy/girl!" right after I deliver.

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  • Another vote for not finding out!
  • I was on the fence about finding out with this baby since it will probably be our last child.  However, DH really wanted to know and when we found out we were moving overseas, I thought it would be nice to know both for stability and logistics.  I'm very happy we know now!  I don't regret our decision at all. 
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