Family Matters
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Do we have any right to privacy (staying with in-laws)?


Re: Do we have any right to privacy (staying with in-laws)?

  • One thing that's always helped me distance myself from other people's hurtful comments is reminding myself that the only reason they said it was that they're trying to be mean. The comment is ONLY intended to make me feel bad. There's no truth to it, there's no justification for saying it (b/c no one is justified in being an ahole for any reason), and it really just means that the person whose only intent is to hurt someone - is very small. It's allowed me to have an unflappable demeanor around ridiculous people, b/c you just feel like you're watching a sitcom.

    No doubt you're under stress and have more on your mind than just the one comment about your grandma, but try to view this as the small and finite arrangement that it is. And go about your business as if she's a fly on the wall. If she makes a comment, just smile and go back to whatever you're doing (watching TV, reading a book, etc.). If she persists, just get up, smile and say, "DH will hopefully be home safely later tonight. You can talk to him about that." If she continues to say something like, "You're in my home...blah blah" - just say, "Yes, we appreciate that so much. DH will be home later to talk to you about [your head in your a$$]."

    You will leave, hopefully sooner than later depending on how much decency the woman has. So just do what you gotta do. Eat. Sleep. Keep yourself entertained.

    ^ you definitely must have a lot more patience than I ever would because I think after one too many comments like OP's MIL, the gloves would be coming off. lol

    I've had an FIL for the last 10 years who rarely ever says anything that isn't cruel or doesn't involve shouting. It's even his "sense of humor." I lived with them for about a year at one point and this is what got me through.
  • I like that your husband is ultimately stick ing up for you and getting you out of there. Personally, I would have told her off at this point and made it clear I am not one to walk on. Perhaps she is seeing just how far she can go before you draw the line.

    Was she always like this?

    Good luck finding a place. I second the opinion asking if you can crash at a freind's place. Not much longer and this will all be behind you. But you and your H need to consider the relationship you two will have with them in the future.

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