Family Matters
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Splitting holiday time

This year the hubs and I actually are not working for Christmas. So, it has become a very stressful issue to try and figure out how we are going to split our time between our respective families. We both have divorced parents that have their our significant others, and our siblings are also beginning to create their own families. We live about 2 hours away from everyone else, and are free from work Christmas eve and Christmas. He is a firefighter and I'm a nurse, so to have the holiday off is rare, and may not happen again for a while. So, all in all I'm stressing about how to split our time among everyone, and still having a nice time. I feel like maybe a large holiday gathering at our house would be appropriate. How is everyone else approaching this issue? What has worked in the past?

Thanks for the advice!

Re: Splitting holiday time

  • I wouldn't get caught up in the "being fair/ being even" aspect of it, to be honest.  Figure out what you and DH would truly enjoy.  Would you really like to host a big party (but keep in mind, "everyone" may not come)?  If so, then do it.

    Would you really enjoy running around to 4 different houses?  If so, then fine, do it. 

    OR - would you rather hit up 2 houses?  If so, then DO it. 

    This is YOUR holiday too - you don't have to make it all about "oh- but we have to be fair to everyone else" if that wont' be fun for you. 

     

    "Beer is living proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy."
    ~Benjamin Franklin

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    catmiss9WedinVolterraMaybride2hersheykiss21
  • I wouldn't get caught up in the "being fair/ being even" aspect of it, to be honest.  Figure out what you and DH would truly enjoy.  Would you really like to host a big party (but keep in mind, "everyone" may not come)?  If so, then do it.

    Would you really enjoy running around to 4 different houses?  If so, then fine, do it. 

    OR - would you rather hit up 2 houses?  If so, then DO it. 

    This is YOUR holiday too - you don't have to make it all about "oh- but we have to be fair to everyone else" if that wont' be fun for you. 

     

    ^^^^^^ This. It's not likely this is going to happen very often, so do what you want. Don't worry about being fair. Just enjoy having a holiday together and do what will make you happy.
    R.Wilsonny
  • I host Christmas every year and I love having everyone come to us.

    I'd suggest hosting if you enjoy doing it. Otherwise, just go where you'll have the best time.
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  • The big holiday gathering has always worked well for my sister. She doesn't have the issue with getting off but she did stress about splitting time. So about 6 years ago she started doing a brunch on Christmas eve every year and it has worked out great since. 
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  • We don't split time b/c everyone expects us to travel to them. Now that we have a child who expects Santa to visit him at our house, we stay home and do out own family thing. But of course, family is welcome. So much less stressful.
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  • We live away from all our family, and this is our first Christmas living far away. We decided to stay here and have a little Christmas, just DH, me and our DS. Also, I'm pregnant and just don't feel like taking a plane trip and having a hectic holiday. Nothing wrong with low-key, if that's what you're in the mood for!
    catmiss9
  • I vote that you spend time alone with your H.

    call them, skype them, whatever you need to do -- won't be possible to split your time between so many people.
    catmiss9
  • I've heard of more and more families celebrating on a different day due to similar situations. One of my co-workers tells her kids, go be with your in-laws, your dad or wherever for Christmas Eve and Christmas Day, but all her kids and grandkids come to her house the Saturday after Christmas to celebrate with her. She goes to church & may visit with a friend on Christmas Day, but then she gets almost a full day of her kids and grandkids instead a few rushed hours.

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