BNOTB
Dear Community,

Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.

If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.

Thank you.

Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.

Pushy In-Laws

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Re: Pushy In-Laws

  • I totally know where you are coming from on this topic. 

    I agree with some of the other women, just tell your in - law's flat out and be honest because the more you try to divert the "baby" attention away, you're just going to get even more sucked up into the craziness.

    My DH and I have been married for almost 2 months now, granted we've been together almost 7 years (high school sweethearts) but my MIL has been driving me UP THE WALL. Even before we were married. Both her and my Mom have boards on Pinterest for their future Grandbabies but while I know they are excited I have a lot of health issues and am not even sure whether or not I can carry kids.

    Whereas, my Mom has told me she would understand my choice whether to have kids or to not have kids because of my health, my MIL has been not so easily understanding.

    I had to straight out tell her that her being pushy, kinda made me mad and feel awkward because as much as she wants a grandchild and as much as we want a kid... we have to face the facts that it might not even be possible. So instead of her getting my hopes up, non-stop, I told her she needs to stop because if I can't get pregnant all she is doing is making me feel like a failure and that I'm not worthy of her son because I cannot give her a Grandchild. 

    I hope things get better for you, and always know you are not alone! 
  • Ugggggh.  I'm lucky my parents never pressured us to have kids, and my IL's have been deceased over 20 years so I never even met them.  But other family members, such as aunts and older cousins have gotten their digs in.  I'd love to say "just because I have a uterus doesn't mean I have to open it for business," but instead I just flat out tell people I dont' want kids or that I'm not interested in pregnancy or motherhood in the least bit.  It usually shuts them up. 

    I'm 42 now and I can't even play the "I'm too old" card because everyone actually ARGUES with me about it!  Like it's their call!  Now when someone sees a picture of me on FB holding a grand-nephew or a friend's baby and comment something like "you need one of those," I just tell them No, I don't.

  • It could be time to limit your contact with your in-laws if they cannot respect your choices. 
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