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Wedding Shower Question

What are your opinions on wedding showers for the second time around?  Well, bride's second time, groom's first.

Both are established, have a house together, good careers and will become a blended family because bride has a DD.

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Re: Wedding Shower Question

  • We had a similar situation when my SIL remarried last year (she'd been married once and had a child, owned her own fully furnished house and he had never been married). I thought it was still a bit much since she registered for everything under the sun but we still threw her a shower since she indicated she wanted one. It was held at the groom's aunt's house and we only invited a few relatives on her side, a few friends and the groom's family.
  • I think a scaled down shower would be ok, maybe really close friends and family.  And maybe something more themed like a lingere shower, or something similar might be more appropriate.

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  • I think scaled down showers are fine, both because of the second marriage and because the house is already well stocked.

    We are grappling with this too.  My brother is getting married again - he had two big showers with his first wedding, but this is his FI's first marriage so we are kind of grappling with what to do.  I get that she "should" have her own shower - its not her fault my brother got married before - but at the same time I don't think it's automatically assumed that the groom's family always throws a shower. We did the first time because all my mom's friends came to the wedding (about 20 of them) and we felt it would be tacky to have one enormous shower and ask the bride's aunt to invite everyone my mom wanted to invite, so we threw one ourselves.  This time around though, not sure what the right protocol is.

     They also have a house, that is fully stocked, so that just kind of throws it off a bit more too IMO - they have nice pans, they have nice appliances, they have pretty decent furniture, etc.  FSIL thinks they can ask people to give them GCs to lowes so they can get hardwoord floors as the shower gifts.  I  am not sure that is entirely appropriate, but I dunno.

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  • I think it depends. If both the bride and groom have been married AND have a well-stocked house, then I think a theme shower or an engagement party is more appropriate. If, on the other hand, only one has been married, they are not well-stocked, etc. etc., then maybe.

    For MrsBecky and gracie's cases, I would say no big shower, but, you know, whatever. If I was invited to something like this, I wouldn't go out of my way to attend, but would probably get something small depending on my relationship with the bride/groom.

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  • Thanks for your input ladies. 

    As of right now, the bride's sisters have decided not to do a shower for her side of the family.  His side of the family is planning on doing something but haven't began planning yet so I don't know who will be included as far as invited guests.  So depending on that guest list, we may or may not then throw a small little theme shower for any close friends that weren't invited to the groom's side of the family shower.
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