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Does your husband give bad gifts??

So my birthday just passed. ugh, I dread anything that has to do with my husband giving me gifts. He thinks he is so good at picking stuff out for me too. Oh and I hate surprises. So about 2 weeks ago, my husband says he has a surprise for my birthday. He would not budge on telling me. My birthday was on Thursday, he said we were celebrating on Saturday. Saturday morning comes and he tells me that his plans fell through and we would not be attending the hockey game he was trying to get tickets for. Mind you Thursday night, on my actual birthday, I was given the choice of watching the hockey game on tv, or having my husband go to a bar to watch it while I sat home alone. So at this point I was a little irritated that he thought I would like to go to a hockey game for my birthday. I like hockey but I do not want to go see it on my birthday. I never tell him this, I am grateful that he even remembers my birthday, but damn babe, sometimes when I tell you I want a new shower curtain for my birthday, it means I want a new shower curtain. This is not a coded message, you do not need to over think this.

Re: Does your husband give bad gifts??

  • so. tell. him.


    isn't marriage all about communication and trust? apparently you can neither trust him to buy you good gifts, nor communicate with him about it.


    if you hate surprises, you should have no problem bringing this up to him and saying something along the lines of "I appreciate that you want to do nice things for my birthday, but truthfully .... i'm a fan of dinner and a movie (or whatever you enjoy), and I think i'd prefer to do that next year."

    if he's THAT into hockey that he can't leave it alone for one night (hey, thats me too!), then compromise. watch the game, then go out for a nice, late dinner.



    my hubby tends to wait til the last minute for me... but he knows what i like. so i dont' worry about his gifts. he knows i love good, quality food -- so a nice dinner is always a winner =)

  • image mrsbryan1006:
    I am grateful that he even remembers my birthday, but damn babe, sometimes when I tell you I want a new shower curtain for my birthday, it means I want a new shower curtain. This is not a coded message, you do not need to over think this.

    Ditto PP.  Tell your H this. 

    Practical gifts aren't exciting to give.  Your H would probably be horrified if you gave him a shower curtain for his birthday, so he can't imagine that you'd actually seriously want one for your birthday.  Who could be excited about a shower curtain?  Now hockey tickets, on the other hand, EVERYBODY he asked (aka all his friends) would be totally excited to watch a hockey game on their birthday.

    Also, sounds like you need to explain your expectations for your birthday- like not being left home alone.  It wouldn't bother me if my H went out with friends on my birthday and left me to my own devices.  Meh.  We'll get around to something eventually.  If your birthday is important to you, you need to give your H some guidelines for what you expect.  You're playing a game without telling him the rules.  Not cool.

  • I have communicated with him about the surprise aspect of this discussion. He knows I hate surprises, he still chooses to do so.
  • I think some people enjoy giving surprises and will always do so...maybe your husband is that kind of person?

     mine is really good at gifts!  although one year I told him I wanted a certain pair of earrings for my birthday and he bought me a pair that was still nice, just not what I wanted.  I love them though and wear them often.

    in the past I've gotten a new camera (i'm a photographer), accesories for amy cameras, jewellery, a small TV, baked goods, carved objects of stone...

    Daisypath Anniversary tickersimage
  • Don't get me wrong, he has always given me nice gifts. Jewelry, clothes, dinners at nice restaraunts. But I have told him so many times that I wanted a cross necklace, but had a hard time finding one i liked, and specifically not to buy one for me, because I am very picky with this 1 item. So he bought me one anyway. I wear it everyday because it was just him trying to be thoughtful, but it really is not one that I would have picked out for myself. It just isn't my style.
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