Hello. I am new here. I've read the boards a little and noticed there were a few transgender related topics, and so hope I found a good community to be part of. Just to get it out of the way, and it might help you understand the topic at hand and why I ask this question, I am a trans girl (MtF), who has been transitioning for nearly six months (taking hormones for almost 5 of those months).
I find that, for obvious reasons, there are a lot of things I must un-do and un-learn, and learn new things, if I will ever be able to successfully live as a woman. One of these things, and which brings me to my question, came up with one of my girl friends recently, and is the topic of if women should be more submissive or assertive when it comes to men, well, others in general.
I'm someone who is definitely more of the assertive type, and one thing I said to my friend and how I really feel, is that I feel that being submissive means being a doormat and allowing others to walk all over you. That is one thing that I've had a hard time with, because in a way I do think that being a woman I will have to learn to be a little more submissive and yielding to others, and I kind of feel like that goes against everything that I am. You know? But is it proper? Should a woman be more submissive and yielding to men? Do men find assertive girls less attractive?
Long before I ever began transitioning, I've seen so much in my life and always hated the way that men typically treat women (not trying to sound like a feminist, honest). While this is just my opinion and I can't speak for all men, I see time and again how men seem to have to dominate and control women, and treat them as more objects than they do human beings, and that is something that I have never been able to understand (even when I was living as a male) and have always been vehemently against. I know that not all men are creeps and there are some very decent guys out there, it just leaves me with me the question, is it ok on the opposite side for women to be assertive?
So I would really love to hear from other women (and men too!) your thoughts on this if you would be so kind.