Hello... First time posting here. FI and I aren't married yet, but we live together in a house we just bought (I made sure everything was in my name, he can't have anything in his name anyways.) We've been having some issues and I'm not sure what to do.
It feels that there's so much to write. It started in the beginning of May when we were house sitting. We had one of our friends over who's a swinger, (we're not, I get rather jealous, and let me tell you, so does he.) and we were all having some beers, playing ping pong & just having some fun... It was around 3 in the morning so I laid down on the couch & fell asleep, and get woken up to FI going down there with our friend watching with his phone out, opening up my hoodie, playing around, etc. if you get my drift. FI doesn't stop after saying stop and trying to keep my legs shut. I'd probably be over this completely if I didn't feel like I was being raped. Again. He knows everything about it, so he knew how I would feel. I think our friend got the message, and left us alone. I asked FI about why he did it, & he said to not feel ashamed, that he feels he can show me off. I told him how it made me feel, and he ends up saying, "I'll just go kill myself now" as if that's going to make me feel better....
Then there's this issue with the computer... He comes home from work, sits on the couch, & goes on his computer for a Facebook game until he has to go to the bathroom or go to bed. Okay, I get he comes home to relax from work, but jeez, we just got the house & there's still boxes not unpacked, the lawn isn't mowed, & he literally can't spare 2 minutes to hold our puppy while I clean up his crate because of his precious facebook game. I told him how I feel, & I get blown off, or get told that I shouldn't feel like that, he just needs to relax. Until 3am, then complain the next day when he has to get up at 8. *Forgot to add, he takes the comp in the bathroom with him.* Seems I just can't win. To add to everything, he keeps drinking on his nights off. He says he took a test to see if he's an alcoholic, and apparently it only came up as "high risk". The bad thing is, he actually communicates when he's drunk/almost there. He acts better when he drinks.
Then earlier today, we decided to go somewhere for lunch, and I knew directions, and he kind of knew them, but not completely. We were listening to the radio and looking at what's in the towns surrounding our new house that we missed the street by about 15 seconds. This was my fault, I wasted his gas, I should've been paying attention, and ruined his attitude until he got a beer in his hand.
I feel like I can't do what I did before we started living together, (He's allergic to just about everything, & I'm an outside, horse kind of person. He hates bugs, being away from technology, etc.) So today I made sure I made plans for myself to start hiking, riding, etc. but there's a person (male) now who does just about everything I do, & we're starting to become friends. I feel terrible for this, but I know I wouldn't have as much fun with FI as I would with him. This guy's outside, good country guy who loves being outside & having fun, not worrying about where the closest cell reception for the internet is.
Aside from all this, on his good days, he always seems to make things better, and it always works. I know I need to put my foot down somewhere, but not quite sure how. I'm sorry this is so long! Thank you so much..!