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Oh, the random people who ask you about children!

I realize this isn't a super active board, but I hope some of you are still out there!

My vent for the day.  I consider myself lucky that none of my friends or family harp on me about kids.  Well, one of my friends many years ago, but no more.  But, of all people, one of my male coworkers does!!!

It is just super bizarre to me.  But he kind of is one of those people who doesn't have a sense for what is "appropriate" and "inappropriate" conversation topics.

This morning, we happened to share the elevator.  In an urgent tone, he says he has a question for me.  So I'm like, "Sure, what?":

--He says, "Are you planning to ever have kids?"

--In my mind, "OMG, NO!!!  Why are you asking me again?"  What I actually said, "No," with a firm tone and annoyed look.

--Him, "Oh!  That's such a shame!  You'd make such a great mom!  How come?"

--Me, "Thanks, but I just don't want children, never had a desire for one." 

--Him, "Oh, that's too bad."

--Me, as the elevator door opens and I can make my escape, "Mmm, hmmm.  See you later, have a good day."


And yeah.  That is about the 4th or 5th time we have had that conversation almost verbatim.  Although a bit surprised when he asked me the first time, I was substantially friendlier about it because, though personal, I didn't mind answering.  But now that he's asked me the same personal question 4-5 times that he really shouldn't have asked once, I am decidedly more annoyed, lol.

I realize I could complain to HR or even tell him stop talking to me about my procreation choice, but I don't work directly with him, just work on the same floor.  So its easier for me to just inwardly roll my eyes the couple times a year he wants to talk to me about my lack of children.     

Re: Oh, the random people who ask you about children!

  • Good grief. Some people have no idea.... Kudos to you for being diplomatic, it would be so easy to get nasty after even the second time someone asked something like that...
    short+sassy
  • It gets so frustrating that people won't let it go. My co-workers know my husband and I really don't want kids. The last few days I've heard so many "oh you have the right idea not having to plan a birthday party/get up for school every day blah blah" or "I'd be so bored without kids" comments. Really folks, I promise that I don't just sit around with nothing to do! It's worse that people feel they have the right to question your reproductive choices, especially strangers.
    short+sassy
  • It gets so frustrating that people won't let it go. My co-workers know my husband and I really don't want kids. The last few days I've heard so many "oh you have the right idea not having to plan a birthday party/get up for school every day blah blah" or "I'd be so bored without kids" comments. Really folks, I promise that I don't just sit around with nothing to do! It's worse that people feel they have the right to question your reproductive choices, especially strangers.

    As long as I'm not feeling judged, I'm pretty easygoing about it.  I don't mind if people ask me if I have kids or tell me about their kids, that's just normal convo.  But then every once in awhile you'll come across someone judgy or who obsesses about it.

    Not that I would actually say it, but the response I would want to give for the bolded is, "Really?  I'd be bored not being able to go to my favorite restaurant at the drop of a hat.  And watching Thomas the Train for the 500th time.  Oooooh...then I'd also be grumpy all the time with not being able to sleep-in on the weekends."

    Just for an update, creepy coworker was actually fired a couple weeks ago for being too lax with getting his work done.

  • dutchgirl76dutchgirl76
    100 Love Its 100 Comments First Anniversary Name Dropper
    member
    edited January 2016
    Haha watching Thomas for the 500th time that's fantastic! One lady I work with has a husband in public service so she's essentially a single mom with a second income due to the schedule. She complains she doesn't have time to read "adult" books, has a hard time getting a babysitter, or going out to dinner with her husband... you're not selling me on this have a kid thing. I do think it's funny that the I'd be bored" comment came from a husband. While he seems like a great dad, it's much easier for them to think kids aren't that much work. Like we talked about before, the men get off easy.

    I'm glad that guy won't bother you anymore. 
    short+sassy
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